Monday, June 18, 2012
Let's see.
I'm starving and have a frozen pizza I'm about to eat. :p
I have laundry. That should about do it. I suppose, I could do Twitter after that. I have to catch up on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show," too, so I might watch what's online of when the golf tournament was on.
I have laundry. That should about do it. I suppose, I could do Twitter after that. I have to catch up on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show," too, so I might watch what's online of when the golf tournament was on.
Rough Day
I might do Twitter a bit later if not tomorrow. :|
I'll post about Justin Bieber's CD on Blogger, at least. Album. :)
I'll post about Justin Bieber's CD on Blogger, at least. Album. :)
Excuses Excuses
Trying to follow others's logic. Then, they make the excuse that things have to go downhill anyway or else they will feel like something needs to happen.
Ad Libbing
I just didn't do anything, but people want to pick at what wasn't supposed to be picked at when things were tossed up, in a pretty friendly way...
Things are going hunky-dory, and I have a feeling things are being hashed.
It was the other way around with people before. Certain people wanted life for me to be crude, and others wanted it to be fluff. They get through to what they're through to.
I have a feeling this is going back to that time I got upset that something was lodged in my memory, but you can always think of it in relation to something else. I think things are really catching on.
You know, there are some things I don't remember doing.
Things are going hunky-dory, and I have a feeling things are being hashed.
It was the other way around with people before. Certain people wanted life for me to be crude, and others wanted it to be fluff. They get through to what they're through to.
I have a feeling this is going back to that time I got upset that something was lodged in my memory, but you can always think of it in relation to something else. I think things are really catching on.
You know, there are some things I don't remember doing.
I thought Irish people were cool.
I thought they were kinda like the English.
They seem kinda gifted.
I'm thinking, though, that Irish is pretty straightforward.
They seem kinda gifted.
I'm thinking, though, that Irish is pretty straightforward.
I wonder
it seems it was big in New Orleans that if you seem right you get wronged. I need a place to grow and develop, too!
Ah!
I kinda wished I quit college in New Orleans and moved to Orlando. I can't believe I'm already 26. I've been here for 6 years.
I will not do anything to say I did it.
I mean, I don't say "nigger."
People think that I am one and that me being a good person doesn't make them look as good by comparison.
People think that I am one and that me being a good person doesn't make them look as good by comparison.
You know, it's very peculiar
people would get at me like I'm not even already branded a good person. All these things that happened were just to get at me.
See
People really prefer to do things that aren't really safe for me.
They say, oh, you deserve it, but it's not good for me, and in the end people forget that people wanted me to do it for their own fun. I can't get beyond this. People are just stuck here and blame all their problems on me, literally.
They say, oh, you deserve it, but it's not good for me, and in the end people forget that people wanted me to do it for their own fun. I can't get beyond this. People are just stuck here and blame all their problems on me, literally.
So, what's at stake?
It seems that lots of people get away with saying certain things. Maybe, they don't expect anything to happen, but I guess people go out of their way to get them back even if things should be okay and perhaps more casual. I don't know. For some reason, the thought escaped me.
I used to just post online innocently, and I didn't know anyone was following me. I didn't look to see if they were. I was happier. Then, something happened. ... I had nothing else to do but to start looking up more on the internet and ended up meeting people I wasn't prepared to meet. I sorta wish I did it before, so that things would be cool, probably.
I used to just post online innocently, and I didn't know anyone was following me. I didn't look to see if they were. I was happier. Then, something happened. ... I had nothing else to do but to start looking up more on the internet and ended up meeting people I wasn't prepared to meet. I sorta wish I did it before, so that things would be cool, probably.
Oh, so, I see, now.
Supposedly, bad things are in store to happen, anyway, but maybe not. I wonder why people can't just shift it in the other direction.
I feel this is all some big game
of mixed people who have Irish genes, but somehow I'm not playing.
People think the Irish are all creative and stuff and cool and nasty at the same time.
They think it's about like stimulating someone in a way before they get criticized and depending on how much you're used to getting away without doing anything wrong, they will proportion certain amounts of punishments, moreso if you're a perfectionist just to be nasty.
Just think of how all I just said applies as to what doing something wrong is.
They try to copy others and see how you are treated and then do something in the wrong way trying to look cool. Well, it might seem cool, but I'm thinking of how you try to control certain people as though you have more of a handle on the situation. I was brought up to have respect for other ways of thinking, but it's backfired with people who are mad and don't care. It makes me wonder. You could actually look at it as a topic. I just feel things are being brought up with me postpartum. I can see why. I suppose everyone gets to have a say or has to have a message to give. I suppose I could be in the wrong, but people forget how I'm in the right in other ways and how my intentions must have been pure. I suppose those things I do are a bit crazy. I guess we'll see what else happens and if we can move along.
People think the Irish are all creative and stuff and cool and nasty at the same time.
They think it's about like stimulating someone in a way before they get criticized and depending on how much you're used to getting away without doing anything wrong, they will proportion certain amounts of punishments, moreso if you're a perfectionist just to be nasty.
Just think of how all I just said applies as to what doing something wrong is.
They try to copy others and see how you are treated and then do something in the wrong way trying to look cool. Well, it might seem cool, but I'm thinking of how you try to control certain people as though you have more of a handle on the situation. I was brought up to have respect for other ways of thinking, but it's backfired with people who are mad and don't care. It makes me wonder. You could actually look at it as a topic. I just feel things are being brought up with me postpartum. I can see why. I suppose everyone gets to have a say or has to have a message to give. I suppose I could be in the wrong, but people forget how I'm in the right in other ways and how my intentions must have been pure. I suppose those things I do are a bit crazy. I guess we'll see what else happens and if we can move along.
I was gonna say something else.
Well, yea, like I can do or say something while I'm upset and people still take advantage of that even if I don't want to show it.
Something "Creative" People Do
They like to make me get upset and then act like it's so bad to get a bit upset inside when something bad is about to happen, not sure why, just to make it seem like I can't be perfect and that it happened because I got a little upset inside.
What did I do wrong?
People are so critical of when I get upset. Things for me aren't so good, anymore. In a way, they are, I have to see, that things should always be okay at some level. If I do something normal where I'm mad but not actually intentionally, people get at me in unproportionate manners. They all want me to learn certain things on how to live my life but never do it in words but rather take up my life in order to do it. I thought if someone did something to you, you could be upset or do something about it or change your ways, hopefully though that you find a good way to change things.
Why do people keep getting at me?
Every time I do something that could have been done better, people take something away from me. I even end up finding good things in it each time, which makes me feel tricked. Still, it changes things and makes me uncomfortable. I don't feel I was even beckoned to be as critical. Some things just aren't full-blown the deed, and I go back and rethink what I thought that should have been different. Things all happen for reasons, though, but I just have to learn from what happens and try not to do anything bad in the first place...
Not Letting Me Get Away
It seems people aren't through with me and think they have a right to boss me around in what I should do and how I should act.
Well, I never met anything bad, so go weep over that. I mean, I never had bad intentions. I thought it was the thought that counted.
Well, talk about not knowing what you want for a long time with someone.
So, I'm supposedly not worth much, when I'm a lot nicer than most people.
People act like they like kidding around, but certain situations get to them.
I wish I were off in college or had some sort of career. I'm guessing you want to eventually take that away from me somehow but can't.
Anyway, now what? I am curious as to how someone can still be engaged in a thought long after they've abandoned it.
I think people are getting at me just because they can but skipping people who are downright oblivious to others's feelings.
I don't feel I need to be taught a lesson. Maybe, I could do with some adjusting and conversation on things like etiquette.
Suddenly, people are acting like I'm really bad when I never start anything. I do get upset and do things by accident. Others influence me in my decisions when I try to butter up their issues for them. I suppose it hurts to do some things you don't have to that aren't really that nice.
I just don't feel people should be hacking away at me.
Another thing is I never really asked for an unproportionate amount of attention from anyone. I've been upset at not getting any but soon learned the freedom I had in going online.
I am curious about people getting plain mad at me for nothing. I don't know what's going on.
So, I dunno. I just feel this is being celebrated a lot. It's clear it's a scheme.
Well, what can I say? I'm sorry about some things and take them back. I never meant anything bad in the first place.
Some things don't "sit well" with me, actually. I mean, I guess they'd humor others, but I feel I am destined for failure if I mess up in in one wrong move.
I don't quite understand being punished for something that was actually a misunderstanding, strange at it may seem.
I suppose people try to dip in a little in the pool without really getting at me. So, they like to practice creative ways of getting at me. I didn't really think that was nice, though. I suppose others are just dealing with the situation and want to get into it.
Later, maybe.
Well, sure, you are supposed to suffer some to right things.
Well, I never met anything bad, so go weep over that. I mean, I never had bad intentions. I thought it was the thought that counted.
Well, talk about not knowing what you want for a long time with someone.
So, I'm supposedly not worth much, when I'm a lot nicer than most people.
People act like they like kidding around, but certain situations get to them.
I wish I were off in college or had some sort of career. I'm guessing you want to eventually take that away from me somehow but can't.
Anyway, now what? I am curious as to how someone can still be engaged in a thought long after they've abandoned it.
I think people are getting at me just because they can but skipping people who are downright oblivious to others's feelings.
I don't feel I need to be taught a lesson. Maybe, I could do with some adjusting and conversation on things like etiquette.
Suddenly, people are acting like I'm really bad when I never start anything. I do get upset and do things by accident. Others influence me in my decisions when I try to butter up their issues for them. I suppose it hurts to do some things you don't have to that aren't really that nice.
I just don't feel people should be hacking away at me.
Another thing is I never really asked for an unproportionate amount of attention from anyone. I've been upset at not getting any but soon learned the freedom I had in going online.
I am curious about people getting plain mad at me for nothing. I don't know what's going on.
So, I dunno. I just feel this is being celebrated a lot. It's clear it's a scheme.
Well, what can I say? I'm sorry about some things and take them back. I never meant anything bad in the first place.
Some things don't "sit well" with me, actually. I mean, I guess they'd humor others, but I feel I am destined for failure if I mess up in in one wrong move.
I don't quite understand being punished for something that was actually a misunderstanding, strange at it may seem.
I suppose people try to dip in a little in the pool without really getting at me. So, they like to practice creative ways of getting at me. I didn't really think that was nice, though. I suppose others are just dealing with the situation and want to get into it.
Later, maybe.
Well, sure, you are supposed to suffer some to right things.
College
I feel as though I was supposed to have a good college experience maybe in voice and ballet when I was still younger.
So, I see people
princessing others around. Okay. This is kinda dragging on. People don't really get what position I'm in. Princess away without me.
People of Less Fru-Fru Cultures
When they're clearly not into something don't need to come to annoy people.
What do you see?
People going overboard thinking I did terrible things that need to be punished redundantly?
Sure, maybe they were the ones who promoted the opposing views, but then again so did the people who hate on it now. You could try to deny it in some people. It is kind of obvious, though, that my goodness was condoned.
Sure, maybe they were the ones who promoted the opposing views, but then again so did the people who hate on it now. You could try to deny it in some people. It is kind of obvious, though, that my goodness was condoned.
I'm having trouble deciding on a major.
My mom said I should do theater. I'm thinking that means I hijack to the new community college and take the prerequisites for musical theater and in due time transfer to UCF to major in musical theater there.
The other thing is that I wanted to do an associates in dance, which is only offered at a different community college, which is okay actually. It doesn't have musical theater, strangely enough, but I was thinking of doing music, instead, on top of dance.
The other thing is that I wanted to do an associates in dance, which is only offered at a different community college, which is okay actually. It doesn't have musical theater, strangely enough, but I was thinking of doing music, instead, on top of dance.
We float off, and we die.
Nothing matters, anymore.
I don't know how to talk to the dead much, but I know how to believe in life.
Might as well die.
I don't know how to talk to the dead much, but I know how to believe in life.
Might as well die.
Regret
I was having a nice time at home growing more with my parents supporting me while I was too tired to work.
After my birthday, last year, I started calling my grandma every day, maybe sometime in September or October and until my birthday just about a month ago.
My aunt visited me my birthday last year. I am glad she came, but if I were go to back in time I would probably tell her to come some other time since my birthday at the time was kinda private with just my immediate family. It's what I'd tell anyone. I told a girl a little younger than me that on my 15th birthday, I think it was.
I had a lot of fun going to the movies every weekend with my dad.
The birthday before, I had just gotten out of the mental hospital and my hair was pretty short, maybe an inch or show long of being shaved bald. I was experimenting with hair dye. Twice, I shaved my head after experimenting with hair dye. I almost was gonna do it again but decided I was unique and might have had some influence not to, after all.
So, when I got out of the mental hospital it was still 2010. My birthday this year was so marvelous. I just pray the future holds fortune.
I had fun going to the movies with my dad and calling his mom each night. I guess going to the movies was worth it since it taught me to sit through movies alas again. I had taken a break.
The big cut in my life was me thinking someone wanted me to call their daughter the "n" word in good fun online because people started feeling violent toward me all the time naturally.
My grandma is pretty healthy, but I'm gonna have to say moreso that I wish I didn't start calling her again after my break because (1) it was awkward, (2) we've actually gotten upset at each other though don't have problems forgetting it, and (3) I just wanted that private time with my parents and this ended up being late each night, usually, when my parents were actually here. I'm sending my grandma a letter saying I might start calling back like in a few months.
My life isn't really settled. Talking to her makes life seem longer though, so it may be helpful. I'd even slept a lot then, in anticipation of my birthday coming up, when we went to Disney and I had like the best time of my life, my family and I, my dad, mom, and younger brother.
It feels like it's too late all the time, but something always comes up. I am thankful for the good times I had, but I wonder what it would have been like otherwise. It's funny when I didn't come up my grandma started telling me to call her more often, too. I actually did when I became a young adult.
I firmly believe that things weren't rectified in my life and that they didn't make sense.
After my birthday, last year, I started calling my grandma every day, maybe sometime in September or October and until my birthday just about a month ago.
My aunt visited me my birthday last year. I am glad she came, but if I were go to back in time I would probably tell her to come some other time since my birthday at the time was kinda private with just my immediate family. It's what I'd tell anyone. I told a girl a little younger than me that on my 15th birthday, I think it was.
I had a lot of fun going to the movies every weekend with my dad.
The birthday before, I had just gotten out of the mental hospital and my hair was pretty short, maybe an inch or show long of being shaved bald. I was experimenting with hair dye. Twice, I shaved my head after experimenting with hair dye. I almost was gonna do it again but decided I was unique and might have had some influence not to, after all.
So, when I got out of the mental hospital it was still 2010. My birthday this year was so marvelous. I just pray the future holds fortune.
I had fun going to the movies with my dad and calling his mom each night. I guess going to the movies was worth it since it taught me to sit through movies alas again. I had taken a break.
The big cut in my life was me thinking someone wanted me to call their daughter the "n" word in good fun online because people started feeling violent toward me all the time naturally.
My grandma is pretty healthy, but I'm gonna have to say moreso that I wish I didn't start calling her again after my break because (1) it was awkward, (2) we've actually gotten upset at each other though don't have problems forgetting it, and (3) I just wanted that private time with my parents and this ended up being late each night, usually, when my parents were actually here. I'm sending my grandma a letter saying I might start calling back like in a few months.
My life isn't really settled. Talking to her makes life seem longer though, so it may be helpful. I'd even slept a lot then, in anticipation of my birthday coming up, when we went to Disney and I had like the best time of my life, my family and I, my dad, mom, and younger brother.
It feels like it's too late all the time, but something always comes up. I am thankful for the good times I had, but I wonder what it would have been like otherwise. It's funny when I didn't come up my grandma started telling me to call her more often, too. I actually did when I became a young adult.
I firmly believe that things weren't rectified in my life and that they didn't make sense.
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