Christina Barrett: 06/23/12

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Why are people acting like they can do better than me?

0: Huh? What all is going on, here? People have reassured me too much that I was okay how I was, like my intentions within my environment and how I dealt with things.

I'm still recovering!!

I feel like I'm gonna crumble. It's, like, from being tired!

You DO

acCEPT other people's misunderstandings.

Something IMPORTANT I Figured Out, Today

Jesus was WRONG!!!

First, I posted in a YouTube I deleted that Jesus set a bad example for other to follow. Why, you say? That means we should live a life of suffering and dying early, on a cross.

You can't turn the other cheek. That's perverted. Only a perv would do that. You can't get all funny and phoney. It's indecent! You walk away and don't give a smile!

aw, there there

~:)

I am starting to figure things out.

Oh, so

I forgot why I almost posted this.

Being Fake

I forgot why I almost posted this.

Building Blocks

I almost forgot why I almost posted this.

I can't believe you could be so ... ? ... uhh :p ... for some reason, it's not coming to me, in this way!

I can't believe you could *grovel* in self-pity removed from modern life yet disconnected from ancient traditions.

*where are you*

Now, I forgot what it was.

It doesn't look good.

I just talked about this.

Or like holding bait for them

and hoping they throat it.

You can't get anything

and everything for doing someone a favor.

I'll address I'm sorry if I'm rude, but-

I don't want to feel close to everyone|anyone in a certain way. If that says enough. I don't see how people don't realize what they're doing and who they are compared to someone else.

"Okay! I'll say it!"

I'm worried that people I should meet die. :| Uh, no one should DIE. Well, like, I care about some people, see, and I'm worried no one really cares what happens to the people I look up to or care about.

Reading Minds

I don't have time to make up things right now, but I thought of something when the TV was on, a sentence that was about 5 words, and the person on TV said it a few seconds later. There was a pause in the air before. It wasn't common.

It bothers you

in the process, which is hard to pinpoint, if I want to have a big nose, which I do, but it's not very pointy. When I went out, someone made my nose feel more spread out. It was getting bigger at the top, but it inflated at the bottom.

ALLOW ME TO FOLLOW UP ON THAT

I AM FREE TO TALK ABOUT HOW RACIST YOU ALL ARE

IT'S CAWLED

FREEDOM OF SPEECH

SO

Then, you weren't clear on your terms. You acted like because I was brutalized that you wouldn't mind, since I didn't brutalize you nor anyone in return, that it would be okay for me to slip up with you but then to spread it like no one knows what's going on!!! !!! !!!

OKAY

I DON'T NEED TO BE CALLED A MONGOLOID DAY IN AND DAY OUT ANY TIME I TALK ABOUT HOW RACIST YOU PEOPLE ARE ... HOW DARE YOU THINK ME A NEGRO AS A LAST RESORT

So

...what I say offends you? That I didn't do it through my own will but because I was pushed to do it? Why not push me NOT to do it?

YOU SHOULD DROP IT

WHY IN THE WORLD DO YOU THINK I WOULD CALL SOMEONE A NIGGER?

The problem is

people forget about how some things are generally okay and think that like they have to be a way that is impossible to be, like in how you try to communicate earnestly.

Why do things like that, in the first place?

I found out today people are crazy about not wanting to admit how things actually are and can't see it in another way.

vents

*breathing*

QUIT ACTING LIKE I DID SOMETHING WRONG

Is that so hard to un der stand?

I SEE YOU DON'T LIKE ME

QUIT TREATING ME LIKE A NIGGER

AND RUINING MY LIFE

YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THE HELL I'M TALKING ABOUT

DON'T BLAME SOMEONE ELSE FOR SOMETHING YOU DID

GET OUT OF MY LIFE, YOU WHORES

DON'T GET MAD AT ME

FOR SOMETHING YOU ACTUALLY WANTED ME TO DO

So, obviously, you niggers,

you do reflect what you want. What you look like shows who you are because it's your doing on your own life. You can tell what a person does and wants, and that shouldn't compromise someone else in the relationship.

I do listen to what others say and learn.

It seems I'm being made to feel that way when I was never mean to anyone.

Oh, I see!

So, just act like everyone else. When did this nonsesnse enter my life?

PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS MEAN TO ME

ABOUT BEING CHINESE

As Long as I'm Not Made to Die

Please, don't be a ditz.

Why would you let someone in your life in order to

make fun of you and make you feel bad about yourself, like you're older?

You were supposed to follow through with something!

Not act like a ditz about it, but I'm sure you couldn't act any differently about what you did. Or is it really not your fault?

Some people don't even know where to focus their thoughts.

And others get upset at you for overstepping boundaries that have been made. Learn to deal with your depth. That depth must be dealt with, in the proper way. Fine, go insult someone who's done nothing wrong to you and then make them feel bad for doing what you wanted!!!

Don't get mad, you!

You can't get mad at someone for doing when you obviously wanted them to do. I'm not listening to you, anymore!!!

Pushed to Do the Wrong Thing

There are some things people think they can get into that hurt the ones we love and don't realize that you matter. Now, I have to worry about things. Well, I guess they make sense in a way. You just have to address the issue, but it really shouldn't have and couldn't have happened in the first place.

What Something Says

Someone creates what's special for you in some ways and then for some reason that mocks you takes that away. It's like it's never about you in that way... People need to stop telling me they hate me because they think I'm better. That's a crazy thought.

My life makes no sense.

I've accomplished a lot and made to feel like I'm nothing. I've been told to do crazy things. I already have a framework of what's right and wrong. I've been pushed by those I trusted to step out of certain boundaries or admired for stepping into some.

I guess things are easy for me.

People want to be on top and create crazy reasons for things and then take back what they seemed to present.

It's funny when you want to turn a good person into a bad person. You shouldn't feel you have anything against someone who actually meant no harm. I've seen people look you in the eye who've even lost a child!

I just don't like when people tell me I have no purpose.

I don't mind a lot of things. Really. :|

I guess people go in feeling guilty.

They do things that are wrong like lie about you somehow.

Maybe, I've committed something I'm unaware of.

It sure seems that way.

There are some things you can't get away with. There are some things you don't seem like you really intend to do and for the reason you weren't meant to say something.

Something That Bothers Me

If someone promises you something, in how they act and what you get the drift of, if they take it back for no reason upsets me.

I mean, no reason means that you don't really have any problems, but someone choses to find fault in what you do. Things annoy people for no reason. It's hard to know what anyone wants these days. I guess they want to keep lying.

How Much I've Actually Practiced Singing

I dunno, I did a lot. I did a lot of piano once I got into Talented Music and did a lot when I still lived in Florida.

Um, I didn't like anyone to hear me sing, so that prohibited me from practicing more, but eventually or somehow rather I did. I know because I've done it a lot and now remember doing it for my dad. I had a lamp with 3 fixtures or whatever in different colors and would perform. I don't know how old I was, but it was probably 13 or 14 +.

I did well in singing in college, but they made it sound like I didn't because maybe I didn't do very well in the end. I took too many courses. I was unable to memorize my piano stuff because I didn't put in that extra effort. I was kinda sent home altogether and told like I can't go back to singing. It's a nice college, but I don't think the plane money would be worth it now, moving after the hurricane. We used to live by it.