Monday, June 25, 2012
When Something Happens
You're supposed to adapt. It's not like you can do something without thinking. That means you're thinking about something and you have to think about it right. Every thing matters.
Lost Something
It seems like I've lost something since talking to my grandma. I mean I stopped. I kinda feel I have it, in a way.
What do you think of when people
say they mean one thing but then show they can accept another? I suppose some don't take to that. I think my life was more about me at one point, but it gets more refined.
So, like I was thinking
I don't mold myself into the offspring generation ... I can get someone in Orlando every time, which is no miracle ... they can't think I'm a nigger.
I mean I don't fit into a mold as an offspring generation and act like it's something. It's funny. I have done things like it out of respect, but that's not like the kind of person I am, in a way.
I mean I don't fit into a mold as an offspring generation and act like it's something. It's funny. I have done things like it out of respect, but that's not like the kind of person I am, in a way.
I'm thinking of what the message really is
and I'm fresh out of ideas. It's like I understand things that are going on. It's really time to do something. It's not time to like make up stuff or something. I'm fresh out of stamina. It seems that something is accused of me. Maybe, I've already experienced a lot of complex and brushed up things and need something different, dunno. Just seemed like the thing to do according to someone else. People have stopped a pattern with me, too. Some people just don't want to interact with me or at least not at a certain time. I have to go about that, it seems. I like to be interesting with other people.
I'll also try
to accept things as they are... I don't know if I'm supposed to attempt to understand what's going on because I don't think I can. It just seems like something had to be done. It's not really something I do, which is something I'm concerned about.
So... I guess we all
have ways of dealing with things we've done. I'm naturally certain ways or chose so early on so that later I transform myself into something else altogether but still have that base and vile way of going through things though it's not really reflected in my overall appearance though seen in my unrefined ways... ..
I guess
though not as young as some people, who are all kids, I mean like the people younger than me and around my age, that I'm in a spiteful mode.
Okay, well, so....
I do not at all get people who don't look like normally people would and instead like something I did like feel life is more about the serious deep non-fun things. I mean, when I was like that, I still cared what I looked like of course and though into traditional things kept a modern sentiment.
I'm glad that
my life's improved. I am annoyed at some things I have to do, like that I have appointments this week.
Though, it kinda grounds me. It tells me I can rest and get ready for it.
My life is a bit hard and uncomfortable, but I'm glad some things are over is all.
Though, it kinda grounds me. It tells me I can rest and get ready for it.
My life is a bit hard and uncomfortable, but I'm glad some things are over is all.
I can accept somethings
and see the meaning behind them. I just don't want to waste my time. I mean, I'm getting older and want to do something with my life. I have things for me that are fun.
I'm not literally wasting my time, but like I don't need to go through these riddles. I like riddles, but I mean the ones that are like ... well, they're okay, but they surprise me.
I just don't like being guilty of the "n" word thing. It's taken up too much of my life.
I'm not literally wasting my time, but like I don't need to go through these riddles. I like riddles, but I mean the ones that are like ... well, they're okay, but they surprise me.
I just don't like being guilty of the "n" word thing. It's taken up too much of my life.
It's okay to be sarcastic.
It seems like life means nothing now.
I don't see what's so funny about thinking you can do something bad in advance to make sure something else doesn't happen. I don't really have problems like that.
I can kinda see now, but I am not really having fun.
I don't see what's so funny about thinking you can do something bad in advance to make sure something else doesn't happen. I don't really have problems like that.
I can kinda see now, but I am not really having fun.
If you're wrong, don't do it, again.
Please, stop being sarcastic. You seem to have no respect for me.
They treat me like I'm *shit*
People from a certain area are very annoying.
I am also annoyed that after I was told enough was enough someone couldn't take it.
Some things really don't make sense.
People seem to want to simplify my life all together and literally rub things into my face, certain feelings I mean.
This is all because of something certain.
People need to quit bothering me.
Sometimes, you don't say certain things.
I see people really have an evil side.
I hate this! Leave me alone with this "n" word thing! It wasn't my idea!
People thing I need to treat others like the princess and the pea. They treat me like I'm *shit*
I am also annoyed that after I was told enough was enough someone couldn't take it.
Some things really don't make sense.
People seem to want to simplify my life all together and literally rub things into my face, certain feelings I mean.
This is all because of something certain.
People need to quit bothering me.
Sometimes, you don't say certain things.
I see people really have an evil side.
I hate this! Leave me alone with this "n" word thing! It wasn't my idea!
People thing I need to treat others like the princess and the pea. They treat me like I'm *shit*
Some people just don't want to admit the truth.
Like, they'd rather have you lie against them than admit that they're wrong.
I can't believe someone literally thinks that they can swindle me to make themselves look better. Like, make it look like I did something to them.
I can't believe someone literally thinks that they can swindle me to make themselves look better. Like, make it look like I did something to them.
What do you think of people who
suddenly come at you for something unsettled by them a long time ago? I mean like there's something you did and they never really did anything about it. Like, then, later it matters. Of course, it's not something that you started. It wasn't anything too bad in some ways, considering how highly suggestive the thing was that caused you to react the way you did. People seem to have a hold on that you should never think they're wrong or something, secretly. How do you do that? Just ignore it, I guess.
So....
I found it interesting Renée Fleming is from Pennsylvania and moved to New York state. I think my dad was more northern in northwestern Pennsylvania and I remember I think he moved between the places, starting and ending in Pennsylvania. Also, I think he was from more south southwestern New York. Now, my grandma and I think a lot of their family live in New York at the border between Pennsylvania, not at the very end near Ohio..
Wait a little late to discipline, eh?
Thought the thoughts down from your control room, and experience no guilt, eh?
I guess
I got upset. I know that things weren't the way they should be, and that's something everyone could think.
What to Do About It
Yes, I am obviously disillusioned, maybe for my own fault.
Well, I do change my ways and not do it again and rearrange my thinking to compliment others.
Well, I do change my ways and not do it again and rearrange my thinking to compliment others.
I feel like I'm bound, too.
It's like disappointing I could get away and people secretly want revenge but something different, like because things affect them in ways that I think they shouldn't, traditionally. I don't know who's perfect.
Doing Unusual ... Out of the Ordinary? ... Things for No Reason
I am expected to contend to certain levels of things that seem nice but that don't make sense, and people not in the situation anyway think that these phoney things are what's serious.
So, this morning...
I didn't eat breakfast with my dad though I was up. I had it around 3:45 A.M. Sometimes, it's better, he seems to think too, to just stay in my room.
People Got the Sign
People forgot they weren't supposed to make snap judgements, like judge people without being right and without thinking, knowing it's not really the right thing to do but maybe they're right. They get mad at you for making suggestions midway an insult from them.
Midway in Thought
I have a sign that sometimes because of this "n" word thing that happened to me or I did that sometimes people think that certain things have to be a certain way with me, but there's a sign that says that's when something's not as it should be.
It seems people are more attuned to me racially than before, but I've never vied to be very Chinese and so have no association with it.
It seems people are more attuned to me racially than before, but I've never vied to be very Chinese and so have no association with it.
Something That Really Annoys Me
I feel sometimes that people in Orlando and like my Grandma can feel for me physically and tap into ruining how I look in some way in a certain area.
Wondering
Now, I'm wondering if I should start again with the traditional music or if I need to get better at musical theater singing...
Beating the Ugliness Out of Me
Me not wanting to be bad but when startled in a bad way thinking of something a little bad ... does that work? I'm trying to get better anyway, so it's not like I'll get worse.
Actually
I'm very fast and dexterous now despite the twitching and I feel healthy from the psychiatric|mental|emotional medicine or whatever it is.
I realized something else.
I do wish everyone would get their butt on the computer.
I didn't actually have much of a life online until I was 21.
It's just that there were no big sites. I don't think enough people know about IMDb, now. I don't know, though.
I did find a good site once at age 11 but lost it and was sad and couldn't find anything else as good later. When Charlie and the Chocolate Factory came up, I was alert and posted about their next movies.
I didn't actually have much of a life online until I was 21.
It's just that there were no big sites. I don't think enough people know about IMDb, now. I don't know, though.
I did find a good site once at age 11 but lost it and was sad and couldn't find anything else as good later. When Charlie and the Chocolate Factory came up, I was alert and posted about their next movies.
Watching "The Ellen DeGeneres Show"
I will try to keep up, though I have appointments until Wednesday and
have problems sleeping, like on a certain schedule. I don't know about
others, but my life has gotten bad with sleeping from moving, as in
where I live, and homework. It lasted a long time without anything
changing enough.
I'll probably watch Friday's episode today when my parents leave for work and my brother, home from college, is sleeping.
I'm still kinda tired so may just post online and practice singing rather than jogging. I might jog in the evening. I'm apprehensive of meeting someone but will try not to keep them long.
I might have to get a keyboard, a little one, just to find the notes to practice some songs singing. I am wondering if I need to save my money and get the keyboard and music stand. Maybe, I will just get a little keyboard and assume I will memorize the music. I'm now working on songs I've already done. The other thing I wanted was a glow in the dark Nook, a machine used to read books on from Barnes & Noble. I had a Kindle, which is from Amazon.com, and it doesn't glow like a computer but somehow works. The glow is supposed to be nice.
So, I guess I'll take a shower when my parents leave for work... I'll eat some Chinese food they have, some more traditional Chinese food, rather than just rice and noodles, as usual.
Argh, there's a bug crawling in my water cup but not my tea cup.
So, yea, I'll probably be online rather than jogging. Maybe, I'll take a break from jogging, unless I feel like going out, until these appointments are through.
I'll probably watch Friday's episode today when my parents leave for work and my brother, home from college, is sleeping.
I'm still kinda tired so may just post online and practice singing rather than jogging. I might jog in the evening. I'm apprehensive of meeting someone but will try not to keep them long.
I might have to get a keyboard, a little one, just to find the notes to practice some songs singing. I am wondering if I need to save my money and get the keyboard and music stand. Maybe, I will just get a little keyboard and assume I will memorize the music. I'm now working on songs I've already done. The other thing I wanted was a glow in the dark Nook, a machine used to read books on from Barnes & Noble. I had a Kindle, which is from Amazon.com, and it doesn't glow like a computer but somehow works. The glow is supposed to be nice.
So, I guess I'll take a shower when my parents leave for work... I'll eat some Chinese food they have, some more traditional Chinese food, rather than just rice and noodles, as usual.
Argh, there's a bug crawling in my water cup but not my tea cup.
So, yea, I'll probably be online rather than jogging. Maybe, I'll take a break from jogging, unless I feel like going out, until these appointments are through.
My life was okay, before.
I pounded my wall once, I mean one hit, and it just sounded like I was frustrated. I went to a spa lady for my blackheads, though I wanted to stay in my room until I was better. She influenced me, then the "n" word thing happened. I ended up in the mental hospital. I hit my wall and things then. One time, I went. My mom acts like I'm fat and clumsy, and I felt bad. A lot of people ignore me for fun. I guess people just don't ... just aren't attuned to what I'm used to. That's people being influenced from living in Louisiana. I lived there, too. There are 2 sides to it, I guess. Most people there I don't get. They don't have a big imagination, in ways, I guess you could say. There are people in the city who seem like they have a bigger imagination. Obviously, they're also stunted. Florida is a little gross, too, though, not quite complete, neither. I don't feel so good about the northeast.
Getting in Trouble
I thought my life was an experiment at first because of voice. I also like ballet, too, but I had to quit anyway so I could finish growing. I wasn't happy short and gained weight from not having time to go to the gym. The ballet wasn't so great at that school, then. It was supposed to be pre-professional. I had a hard time only memorizing. She recommended me down.
So, I was told not to take voice and not to be in music education. That bothered me, and I didn't do well in school after that, for some reason. I should have gotten out of the religion classes... They made no sense. I didn't see any of the material learned in testing.
So, I finally stayed home and eventually went on the internet all day.
I bought some things with store cards that my parents aren't paying back. If I work, I'm supposed to pay it back. So, it's just a debt I still have. I used the money for like movies by the director of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory so I could get into him. I looked up the movie when I came home from up north during a hurricane down south at my real college. I saw the director and was like whoa. That guy is getting something done. Well, I also did visual arts since I was young and kinda did at least crafts a lot at the time. So, art impressing people was easy and I did it until 16. Eventually, I found out he also did The Nightmare Before Christmas, well, I guess I already know because of Corpse Bride.
So, then, I thought, since someone said her partner said their son would be gay from listening to Judy Garland ... and I think really they wanted me online to for fun call their daughter the "n" word my parents are always onto me, though now I even come out of my room to see them and eat, which before I didn't. I think they're regretting I went to the mental hospital now.
A few things have happened, like me getting mad at suggestions, but nothing big in a way. I don't buy too much, anymore. Like, at first, I used my money ... well, at college I ended up eating out sometimes because I couldn't stand the food anymore. I had gotten some ballet DVDs and stuff like that, I know a ballet book, I dunno. My dad used to buy me stuff, though, and my mom, too. I guess I got in trouble when I used the store cards. They just don't want to pay it back, but they pay for other things. Eventually, it'll get paid back. It'd be nice if I could at least get a temporary part time job. I tried to get one before but after I spent money on the ballet stuff, but they wanted to hire the people that needed the job. I also got turned down at Sears. I saw some good-looking black guys doing equipment there. I don't know what was wrong with me, then.
So, now, my parents and maybe others in the extended family get upset at me if I think something, like I'm still a good person even though the "n" word thing happened. I don't get it, really, for some reason. Like, I didn't want to do it, but then I get in trouble because well other people do it because maybe their families aren't really as good, which doesn't sound nice...
So, I was told not to take voice and not to be in music education. That bothered me, and I didn't do well in school after that, for some reason. I should have gotten out of the religion classes... They made no sense. I didn't see any of the material learned in testing.
So, I finally stayed home and eventually went on the internet all day.
I bought some things with store cards that my parents aren't paying back. If I work, I'm supposed to pay it back. So, it's just a debt I still have. I used the money for like movies by the director of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory so I could get into him. I looked up the movie when I came home from up north during a hurricane down south at my real college. I saw the director and was like whoa. That guy is getting something done. Well, I also did visual arts since I was young and kinda did at least crafts a lot at the time. So, art impressing people was easy and I did it until 16. Eventually, I found out he also did The Nightmare Before Christmas, well, I guess I already know because of Corpse Bride.
So, then, I thought, since someone said her partner said their son would be gay from listening to Judy Garland ... and I think really they wanted me online to for fun call their daughter the "n" word my parents are always onto me, though now I even come out of my room to see them and eat, which before I didn't. I think they're regretting I went to the mental hospital now.
A few things have happened, like me getting mad at suggestions, but nothing big in a way. I don't buy too much, anymore. Like, at first, I used my money ... well, at college I ended up eating out sometimes because I couldn't stand the food anymore. I had gotten some ballet DVDs and stuff like that, I know a ballet book, I dunno. My dad used to buy me stuff, though, and my mom, too. I guess I got in trouble when I used the store cards. They just don't want to pay it back, but they pay for other things. Eventually, it'll get paid back. It'd be nice if I could at least get a temporary part time job. I tried to get one before but after I spent money on the ballet stuff, but they wanted to hire the people that needed the job. I also got turned down at Sears. I saw some good-looking black guys doing equipment there. I don't know what was wrong with me, then.
So, now, my parents and maybe others in the extended family get upset at me if I think something, like I'm still a good person even though the "n" word thing happened. I don't get it, really, for some reason. Like, I didn't want to do it, but then I get in trouble because well other people do it because maybe their families aren't really as good, which doesn't sound nice...
My 1 Flaw
I guess, I am contending to a normal life. So, something I do most people aren't trained to do is ...
I just realized, it eventually took extra energy living on a campus, but I suppose it would still work out. I am wondering if I'm too old for what they do in college or if I'm behind.
... So, I post on line, a lot. I seem to always fit in music, singing. I used to do piano more. I dunno. Like, I played musicals, I guess, and was excited to do special music school in high school, Talented Music 2 years and 1 year Talented Theater and later a summer and year of weekends for music school at a big arts school in New Orleans.
Um... So, the only thing I'm worried about would be that I like both singing and posting online. I'm wondering about ballerinas. I think they can post online. I even don't think I should be a big reader, which I'm not. I've read things and have excelled, maybe posting online. I seem to post better than others though not as much, which is probably one of the deepest cuts for me. I didn't post online all growing up but did e-mail. I don't think that'd be why. I wasn't really a very bad person compared to others. Now, people I know aren't big even posting online, not even a blog, maybe. People just stopped using Facebook and MySpace. I am just so fascinated about keeping a daily blog to spew my hurt on. Otherwise, I guess if I became some sort of "musician" which includes singing that I'd post about it on my blog and not much else, though now I guess I post about the movies! I was worried because I think handwriting is a good thing that I'd keep a journal. You know, I got the soundtrack to Brave, the Pixar about the Celtic girl. So, I'm thinking of getting everything on iTunes and books even electronically. What else? Yea, there's Netflix online and even on TV now! So, yea, you can get movies on iTunes. I think I will do that. I want to get rid of my stuff. I do save my cards and even notes my parents give me at home. It's just nice to know exactly what you have. I do have some VHS's of clips of the Royal Ballet School doing The Nutcracker, also with the Royal Ballet, which is not sold and I think it's definitely a big thing. I don't know what's up. I know I started gymnastics at age 1 technically, age 1 3|4. I liked ballet but didn't do it my whole life, but I've always been doing piano or something. It's funny I even had time for that.
Anyway ... So, yea ... I shouldn't worry about it, but I do, I mean, I like living online and at the movies, a lot. I don't have to work so have time to sing. I guess that works out. I love singing and will always sing until I'm tired, maybe not technically, though that's what's usually happened, which I assume is what is normal? I know at the upstanding Jesuit school in New Orleans people didn't practice 1|2 hour a day like they were assigned to, mostly... The community college claims you need 4 certain kinds of songs prepared to audition, acting like younger people should flock, and that the minimum, not sure if this is even true, is to practice 1 hour a day, which sounds like a good amount - I think that practicing more than once a day works best. :| I don't wanna work while I'm in school. I'd take a loan. I just feel funny that even at a community college you practice 1 hour every day, no fail. It's probably because it's intended for the working adult. What about 45 minutes 5 days a week, or *at least* 20 minutes. I'm wondering because operas themselves are so long. It used to seem like a possibility. I'm not up for work with words. I guess that's why I did piano. Imagine people featured in movies don't have to work that much. Who pays attention to the opera, let alone even all the movies? What do people do for fun in life? People have it hard. I think I could do voice at a college... I did find I practiced maybe 3 hours a day and wanted to do more. I had 3 instruments, though. Maybe it was 1 hour, but I've practiced more than that. It's different when you're on a campus with no family and like no friends in a way.
Oh, thinking about the thing about visiting where we used to live in the nation's oldest continuing city, my dad wanted to stay at a hotel and eat at a nice restaurant next time. I assume we can go later.
So, I think that 1 hour of practicing every day is too much for a community college. I am offended they think it's a place for kids. People who go there have kids. I don't know what they mean, but it'd be nice if they do have a book of warm-ups. I did choir so thought I knew how to warm up. I started warming up again. I did when I woke up but I guess stopped to post this. 1 hour seems right for a community college. For a conservatory, I'm guessing they practice 2 1|2 hours a day plus go to 2 or 3 ensembles, other homework blah.
I guess I'm most upset I don't have the sweet innocent voice I once had as a teenager. I can kinda sing like I did in choir when I was a kid. It was a big time for me. Essentially, I'm still the same. I used to sing while I played mostly. I didn't even own The Phantom of the Opera, though. The instrumental part to Cats was interesting. That seems neat because at least the white cat also dances, though the white can doesn't sing alone. I wish I did voice. A lot of kids started in high school. I did an organ camp at Oberlin in northern Ohio, and they probably did piano or started with organ at 16 or 15 or maybe earlier. It was probably 15 or 16. I know I started playing around at 15, well, no, I just played it like a piano for church services and wasn't allowed to prepare, didn't even know the songs in advance. The people in charge of music and clerical work were fired along with that priest. The priest before was there for 30 years, and there were older people in the choir who were there 30 years.
I'm thinking the way I post online is juvenile and that I'll get over it. I dunno. I think the main thing in life is Hollywood. I realize there are some people that shine as one. I think it's funny you'll have like 3 or 4 theaters of the same movie, though. It must be expensive. I was thinking and even figured hey how everyone could be a movie star.
One big thing about me is that I well when I read about people from a long time ago, well, through the Little House Books and American Girl, that I wanted to be old-fashioned and wear dresses and boots. I stayed that way forever, though I was also into modern life. Who isn't? I was adamant about everything and for some reason stood out. I think gymnastics as a kid made me smart for life, though I wasn't on a team. I was ahead. I started at age 1 3|4.
So, the way I post online is kinda filler for my life. It is a main feature to me. So ...
... What was I gonna say? Um ... I think that I am still for some reason developing into a woman and hope I do. The talking online is good for my communication skills. I used to not. I get grumpy when I don't get to.
So, like, I like getting accounts for big movies or using one main one. It's fun to up your reputation, as a person. I don't like how people judge me for mistakes from the past that have some sort of an explanation.
I just realized, it eventually took extra energy living on a campus, but I suppose it would still work out. I am wondering if I'm too old for what they do in college or if I'm behind.
... So, I post on line, a lot. I seem to always fit in music, singing. I used to do piano more. I dunno. Like, I played musicals, I guess, and was excited to do special music school in high school, Talented Music 2 years and 1 year Talented Theater and later a summer and year of weekends for music school at a big arts school in New Orleans.
Um... So, the only thing I'm worried about would be that I like both singing and posting online. I'm wondering about ballerinas. I think they can post online. I even don't think I should be a big reader, which I'm not. I've read things and have excelled, maybe posting online. I seem to post better than others though not as much, which is probably one of the deepest cuts for me. I didn't post online all growing up but did e-mail. I don't think that'd be why. I wasn't really a very bad person compared to others. Now, people I know aren't big even posting online, not even a blog, maybe. People just stopped using Facebook and MySpace. I am just so fascinated about keeping a daily blog to spew my hurt on. Otherwise, I guess if I became some sort of "musician" which includes singing that I'd post about it on my blog and not much else, though now I guess I post about the movies! I was worried because I think handwriting is a good thing that I'd keep a journal. You know, I got the soundtrack to Brave, the Pixar about the Celtic girl. So, I'm thinking of getting everything on iTunes and books even electronically. What else? Yea, there's Netflix online and even on TV now! So, yea, you can get movies on iTunes. I think I will do that. I want to get rid of my stuff. I do save my cards and even notes my parents give me at home. It's just nice to know exactly what you have. I do have some VHS's of clips of the Royal Ballet School doing The Nutcracker, also with the Royal Ballet, which is not sold and I think it's definitely a big thing. I don't know what's up. I know I started gymnastics at age 1 technically, age 1 3|4. I liked ballet but didn't do it my whole life, but I've always been doing piano or something. It's funny I even had time for that.
Anyway ... So, yea ... I shouldn't worry about it, but I do, I mean, I like living online and at the movies, a lot. I don't have to work so have time to sing. I guess that works out. I love singing and will always sing until I'm tired, maybe not technically, though that's what's usually happened, which I assume is what is normal? I know at the upstanding Jesuit school in New Orleans people didn't practice 1|2 hour a day like they were assigned to, mostly... The community college claims you need 4 certain kinds of songs prepared to audition, acting like younger people should flock, and that the minimum, not sure if this is even true, is to practice 1 hour a day, which sounds like a good amount - I think that practicing more than once a day works best. :| I don't wanna work while I'm in school. I'd take a loan. I just feel funny that even at a community college you practice 1 hour every day, no fail. It's probably because it's intended for the working adult. What about 45 minutes 5 days a week, or *at least* 20 minutes. I'm wondering because operas themselves are so long. It used to seem like a possibility. I'm not up for work with words. I guess that's why I did piano. Imagine people featured in movies don't have to work that much. Who pays attention to the opera, let alone even all the movies? What do people do for fun in life? People have it hard. I think I could do voice at a college... I did find I practiced maybe 3 hours a day and wanted to do more. I had 3 instruments, though. Maybe it was 1 hour, but I've practiced more than that. It's different when you're on a campus with no family and like no friends in a way.
Oh, thinking about the thing about visiting where we used to live in the nation's oldest continuing city, my dad wanted to stay at a hotel and eat at a nice restaurant next time. I assume we can go later.
So, I think that 1 hour of practicing every day is too much for a community college. I am offended they think it's a place for kids. People who go there have kids. I don't know what they mean, but it'd be nice if they do have a book of warm-ups. I did choir so thought I knew how to warm up. I started warming up again. I did when I woke up but I guess stopped to post this. 1 hour seems right for a community college. For a conservatory, I'm guessing they practice 2 1|2 hours a day plus go to 2 or 3 ensembles, other homework blah.
I guess I'm most upset I don't have the sweet innocent voice I once had as a teenager. I can kinda sing like I did in choir when I was a kid. It was a big time for me. Essentially, I'm still the same. I used to sing while I played mostly. I didn't even own The Phantom of the Opera, though. The instrumental part to Cats was interesting. That seems neat because at least the white cat also dances, though the white can doesn't sing alone. I wish I did voice. A lot of kids started in high school. I did an organ camp at Oberlin in northern Ohio, and they probably did piano or started with organ at 16 or 15 or maybe earlier. It was probably 15 or 16. I know I started playing around at 15, well, no, I just played it like a piano for church services and wasn't allowed to prepare, didn't even know the songs in advance. The people in charge of music and clerical work were fired along with that priest. The priest before was there for 30 years, and there were older people in the choir who were there 30 years.
I'm thinking the way I post online is juvenile and that I'll get over it. I dunno. I think the main thing in life is Hollywood. I realize there are some people that shine as one. I think it's funny you'll have like 3 or 4 theaters of the same movie, though. It must be expensive. I was thinking and even figured hey how everyone could be a movie star.
One big thing about me is that I well when I read about people from a long time ago, well, through the Little House Books and American Girl, that I wanted to be old-fashioned and wear dresses and boots. I stayed that way forever, though I was also into modern life. Who isn't? I was adamant about everything and for some reason stood out. I think gymnastics as a kid made me smart for life, though I wasn't on a team. I was ahead. I started at age 1 3|4.
So, the way I post online is kinda filler for my life. It is a main feature to me. So ...
... What was I gonna say? Um ... I think that I am still for some reason developing into a woman and hope I do. The talking online is good for my communication skills. I used to not. I get grumpy when I don't get to.
So, like, I like getting accounts for big movies or using one main one. It's fun to up your reputation, as a person. I don't like how people judge me for mistakes from the past that have some sort of an explanation.
Why I Might Be Entertaining
I do like acting too and feel I've sung and played the piano a lot, not sure how much I've done things compared to others, like including some ballet which I kept up until I turned 21.
My favorite music, since I was a bit dorky, was children's music, folk songs, and church music. Later, I got into pop and musicals.
I did music education in college. A big thing for me was like music for children, I guess, or something like that, that everyone should sing I agreed.
My favorite music, since I was a bit dorky, was children's music, folk songs, and church music. Later, I got into pop and musicals.
I did music education in college. A big thing for me was like music for children, I guess, or something like that, that everyone should sing I agreed.
Entertaining Songs
Songs like "Moon River," "Suo Gân," "The Ash Grove," "Greensleeves," and maybe others I even know are good to sing. Even things like "Suwannee River" might cover a real traditional singer's repertoire.
... You know, I might seem like gay trash in singing *ahahaha* I mean like I'm all up to what's proper but don't sing much. Part of the reason I quit college was so I could sing on my own... Maybe, I just need to move the keyboard to my room now that my dad does not use it. Anyway, how shall I say this, when I took singing in college, I thought the kids were very much like sucking up but still very casual.
I didn't really take a break in singing when I was 12 and 13 when I moved when there was no children's choir. Oh, and I was too shy to start singing in front of someone. I looked different, too, than before because I quit gymnastics. The music teacher's daughter where I lived before also did gymnastics. I went with her once but decided not to go back. My mom, brother, and I would walk around the city, which was the oldest continuing city in the U.S., and that kept me even skinnier than when I did gymnastics. It was in northeastern Florida. It was glorious! Ah! There was a sea breeze often, I think, like anywhere in the city, but it was 95 degrees F. For some reason, that was pretty hot, well yea that is. It seems hotter than here in Orlando. Maybe Orlando has a higher level of land.
The musical songs supposedly are for amateurs, I think. I talked to a girl in voice who was younger than me when I was still in grade school, and I think she said it as musical theater that is louder singing that ruins your voice or something. I always grew up hearing it was pop. Still, people go off and alter their voices and I guess just do it for fun, which makes sense, though I assume all this still means that there are pop singing things that don't ruin your voice.
I guess, I've found that musical theater songs don't have to be sung in a way that ruins your voice and that it's more entertaining to others. I like looking up people singing like "All I Ask of You" and things like from The Phantom of the Opera. I found a nice video of a girl singing "The Trout," or Die Forelle by Schubert. This is interesting. It's an old recording of it. It just shows you what life was like a long time ago... YouTube
You know, one reason I didn't post online was because I had a busy life, including getting homework moving from southeastern and northeastern Florida to Louisiana. *ahahaha* So, when I finally posted online, I had a buildup of things I've done in life to go off for like forever. I feel a bit tackled now, I must say. *looks from side to side* You know, I've been sleeping awhile and started to feel, which was interesting. At first, I had a dream someone I've known awhile was there, and then I just felt. I don't feel now. I feel, in a way. I feel like I'm in trouble all the time. Um. People have been mean to me, but no one makes a big deal out of it. Everything I've done was a misunderstanding or something like that. So, I always thought oh I could sing online if I get bored and I have all day to practice. For some reason, I didn't want to do the classical songs. I did, but I didn't get the books until later. My dad wanted a music stand, and I don't want to take it back because he uses it. I'll have to buy one in the next month or 2. It's almost July already, I can hardly believe. Ever since I stopped calling my grandma every night for 45 minutes, I've felt like time goes by very quickly. I can't believe we've straddled the middle of the month. It's like I'm old now and time is nothing. *Wah* I was just thinking about death. So, in bed, hard to believe I slept that long, I was just like tossing from side to side. Somehow, it ended up being a long time. I did used to feel something from my blanket, but lately I liked to ignore feeling anything, though at least I wasn't suffering. I don't know when I'll go back to sleep, but someone's coming to see me at 5 I think about doing theater, for psychiatric reasons. I don't think I'm gonna do it, but I dunno. It'll just be an offer. I don't like this being in the limelight in my family. They always look at me like I have to dedicate my life to when other people were the ones even to make me think they wanted me to use the "n" word with them. It's always about that, and it's been over 2 years. *glares* You know, from what I just said they'd think I was wrong to say that. They're the ones who start trouble. For some reason I was just thinking we haven't been to the nation's oldest city this year. My brother wanted to leave the little oldest school house earlier somehow since more people came in, and it was $5. I asked my mom about it, at first. I came home and asked my dad why he was acting funnily for awhile and then he made me take more medicine, took me to the psychiatrist, though he's lowered the dosage. My parents are sick. They don't like to have to tell us what to do, and most people wouldn't get mad like that. People in public just are influenced these days to not like me. Wow, $5, and there was a reason, though I wanted to go back and see something, again. Now, you realize, which when I realize something people agree but not if it's a point about me not being in trouble about the "n" word thing, well people just forget everything and realize they don't know what they're doing exactly. I guess I have to admit my parents feel pushed about the "n" word thing. That's really too bad. I don't contend with it. I'm not the only one in danger. :( I wish this didn't happen. My life means something to me.
So, yes... I feel a bit old to be *learning* singing, I admit. I just don't feel like it now because I'm terrible, probably because of the "n" word thing. I started singing after it but didn't record enough. I was 23. I'm 26, now. I just turned 26 a month ago. I even was considering going back to college. I guess I don't need to do theater. I'm happy the way things are, going to the movies and posting online. I'm excited about cooking more now. I am having fun jogging. It's just gotten hot, and that gives me even more of a workout.
You know, I feel a bit crazy. I just realized I might have Jewish, but I also know I'm Native American, so ... but my mom is just Chinese-Indonesian. With my dad, it's all from his mom, I think. I'm pretty sure his dad isn't indian. My grandma has been more harsh since the "n" word thing. I told my aunt, too, if I called her at night to read the Bible I might go to sleep later, which can be bad for me and my intentions. I did want to work. It's hard, though, being mixed race, and I guess we have an issue with money. I'm happy being a normal person, though, but wish that we had like a nicer life in some way. People in Orlando are very extroverted. It can work out. It's probably smarter than a lot of places, still. They seem to get to the issue, but, when you get down to it, they're tacky sometimes.
It seems I should have done singing when I was younger, seriously, and took voice. I didn't have enough time for piano and got in trouble, like was told I was bad by my Russian teacher. I had too much homework and had just moved from Florida to Louisiana. That area in Louisiana has the lowest level of education, though, in the U.S., and Florida, is 2nd from there. It's funny during the hurricane I couldn't read their music history. Also, I was supposed to go to dance but didn't and missed a family reunion for the audition. My shoes were too small and hurt, and I left. This was like 2 years ago, quite depressing.
... You know, I might seem like gay trash in singing *ahahaha* I mean like I'm all up to what's proper but don't sing much. Part of the reason I quit college was so I could sing on my own... Maybe, I just need to move the keyboard to my room now that my dad does not use it. Anyway, how shall I say this, when I took singing in college, I thought the kids were very much like sucking up but still very casual.
I didn't really take a break in singing when I was 12 and 13 when I moved when there was no children's choir. Oh, and I was too shy to start singing in front of someone. I looked different, too, than before because I quit gymnastics. The music teacher's daughter where I lived before also did gymnastics. I went with her once but decided not to go back. My mom, brother, and I would walk around the city, which was the oldest continuing city in the U.S., and that kept me even skinnier than when I did gymnastics. It was in northeastern Florida. It was glorious! Ah! There was a sea breeze often, I think, like anywhere in the city, but it was 95 degrees F. For some reason, that was pretty hot, well yea that is. It seems hotter than here in Orlando. Maybe Orlando has a higher level of land.
The musical songs supposedly are for amateurs, I think. I talked to a girl in voice who was younger than me when I was still in grade school, and I think she said it as musical theater that is louder singing that ruins your voice or something. I always grew up hearing it was pop. Still, people go off and alter their voices and I guess just do it for fun, which makes sense, though I assume all this still means that there are pop singing things that don't ruin your voice.
I guess, I've found that musical theater songs don't have to be sung in a way that ruins your voice and that it's more entertaining to others. I like looking up people singing like "All I Ask of You" and things like from The Phantom of the Opera. I found a nice video of a girl singing "The Trout," or Die Forelle by Schubert. This is interesting. It's an old recording of it. It just shows you what life was like a long time ago... YouTube
You know, one reason I didn't post online was because I had a busy life, including getting homework moving from southeastern and northeastern Florida to Louisiana. *ahahaha* So, when I finally posted online, I had a buildup of things I've done in life to go off for like forever. I feel a bit tackled now, I must say. *looks from side to side* You know, I've been sleeping awhile and started to feel, which was interesting. At first, I had a dream someone I've known awhile was there, and then I just felt. I don't feel now. I feel, in a way. I feel like I'm in trouble all the time. Um. People have been mean to me, but no one makes a big deal out of it. Everything I've done was a misunderstanding or something like that. So, I always thought oh I could sing online if I get bored and I have all day to practice. For some reason, I didn't want to do the classical songs. I did, but I didn't get the books until later. My dad wanted a music stand, and I don't want to take it back because he uses it. I'll have to buy one in the next month or 2. It's almost July already, I can hardly believe. Ever since I stopped calling my grandma every night for 45 minutes, I've felt like time goes by very quickly. I can't believe we've straddled the middle of the month. It's like I'm old now and time is nothing. *Wah* I was just thinking about death. So, in bed, hard to believe I slept that long, I was just like tossing from side to side. Somehow, it ended up being a long time. I did used to feel something from my blanket, but lately I liked to ignore feeling anything, though at least I wasn't suffering. I don't know when I'll go back to sleep, but someone's coming to see me at 5 I think about doing theater, for psychiatric reasons. I don't think I'm gonna do it, but I dunno. It'll just be an offer. I don't like this being in the limelight in my family. They always look at me like I have to dedicate my life to when other people were the ones even to make me think they wanted me to use the "n" word with them. It's always about that, and it's been over 2 years. *glares* You know, from what I just said they'd think I was wrong to say that. They're the ones who start trouble. For some reason I was just thinking we haven't been to the nation's oldest city this year. My brother wanted to leave the little oldest school house earlier somehow since more people came in, and it was $5. I asked my mom about it, at first. I came home and asked my dad why he was acting funnily for awhile and then he made me take more medicine, took me to the psychiatrist, though he's lowered the dosage. My parents are sick. They don't like to have to tell us what to do, and most people wouldn't get mad like that. People in public just are influenced these days to not like me. Wow, $5, and there was a reason, though I wanted to go back and see something, again. Now, you realize, which when I realize something people agree but not if it's a point about me not being in trouble about the "n" word thing, well people just forget everything and realize they don't know what they're doing exactly. I guess I have to admit my parents feel pushed about the "n" word thing. That's really too bad. I don't contend with it. I'm not the only one in danger. :( I wish this didn't happen. My life means something to me.
So, yes... I feel a bit old to be *learning* singing, I admit. I just don't feel like it now because I'm terrible, probably because of the "n" word thing. I started singing after it but didn't record enough. I was 23. I'm 26, now. I just turned 26 a month ago. I even was considering going back to college. I guess I don't need to do theater. I'm happy the way things are, going to the movies and posting online. I'm excited about cooking more now. I am having fun jogging. It's just gotten hot, and that gives me even more of a workout.
You know, I feel a bit crazy. I just realized I might have Jewish, but I also know I'm Native American, so ... but my mom is just Chinese-Indonesian. With my dad, it's all from his mom, I think. I'm pretty sure his dad isn't indian. My grandma has been more harsh since the "n" word thing. I told my aunt, too, if I called her at night to read the Bible I might go to sleep later, which can be bad for me and my intentions. I did want to work. It's hard, though, being mixed race, and I guess we have an issue with money. I'm happy being a normal person, though, but wish that we had like a nicer life in some way. People in Orlando are very extroverted. It can work out. It's probably smarter than a lot of places, still. They seem to get to the issue, but, when you get down to it, they're tacky sometimes.
It seems I should have done singing when I was younger, seriously, and took voice. I didn't have enough time for piano and got in trouble, like was told I was bad by my Russian teacher. I had too much homework and had just moved from Florida to Louisiana. That area in Louisiana has the lowest level of education, though, in the U.S., and Florida, is 2nd from there. It's funny during the hurricane I couldn't read their music history. Also, I was supposed to go to dance but didn't and missed a family reunion for the audition. My shoes were too small and hurt, and I left. This was like 2 years ago, quite depressing.
Some people really don't care about me.
The world is beyond them. They just have fetishes and make fun of me at certain times, like if I got mad at a certain time for a certain reason, if something like that happens again things aren't okay. I never get mad for no reason. People really get to me in Orlando and before online. I wonder if I'd get mad online if I posted more about race, again. Probably not... Those people stopped bothering me... I did take a break from posting at that place. My other thing I do more lately is singing and sometimes I posted it there. I don't have anything good enough to feature on the Classical Music boards. The General Music boards are busy. I guess we should post ourselves on the board, though I suppose some people refrain from respect, though that's not necessarily how it is.
Learning New Songs
I only did much voice lessons for a year. I was told not to take them anymore because, though accurate they mentioned, I was too shy or unexpressive. That confuses me. I honestly heard the voice professors sing, and they weren't like extra excited. I was very bewildered, but they were beyond bubbly though not silly as people. The kids just seemed like they were copying opera stars, like they hadn't really sung much. One went to a choir school maybe at 10 years old, 5th grade. Like, it seemed like maybe when you copy an accent but don't get into it completely. They sounded good and probably improved as time went along. I guess people could also be stark. Overall, it seemed like I was the best. Maybe I had the most multidimensional voice, at the time.
I figured there were 1 or 2 reasons I never took voice. I told my parents I wanted to sing in kindergarten, but we didn't do anything. By the time I was 7 ... I told my mom "I want to sing somehow." So, when I was 5, I was awake to singing. I was allowed in choir at 8, 3rd grade. I moved for 7th grade, and there was no choir, but I was allowed to join the adult choir at church when I asked starting high school. I was the youngest one and was in it all of high school and quit for college and moving during a hurricane. I was probably gonna move, anyway ... my brother and mom were gonna stay so we didn't miss relationships and activities ... my dad had to get a new job somewhere else. I didn't do choir when I came home from college to stay, at least for awhile, because I was soo tired for a long time, to this day. I don't know why I haven't caught up on sleep loss of 10 years. I had a hard time at first and didn't think to post on online message boards when I had nothing to do. We did get a keyboard and I kept forgetting about karaoke. I knew a lot of songs from musicals and a few folk songs.
I think I will do the songs I already know, re-look up the Italian after I do the English ones. I suppose the English ones would help, anyway, since I don't speak Italian. I am interested in learning another|other language|s. So, the voice teacher in college said to like pick a language and that she still couldn't get hers, German, though she was in Germany for 20 years. That really confuses me because I thought I got it the first day. We only did much Italian, though, because Italian was the class they offered the 2nd semester, the 1st being a general get to know you kind of class... which was fun, but I always felt guilty because why would I be there as a music education major? I don't know about secondary instruments, but I took piano and organ, as well as voice. I auditioned for piano and organ, and I was allowed to major in either and, perhaps, if I had time to prepare, I would get in voice, judging from the other kids. I've gained a stronger voice from being allowed to sing in college.
I figured there were 1 or 2 reasons I never took voice. I told my parents I wanted to sing in kindergarten, but we didn't do anything. By the time I was 7 ... I told my mom "I want to sing somehow." So, when I was 5, I was awake to singing. I was allowed in choir at 8, 3rd grade. I moved for 7th grade, and there was no choir, but I was allowed to join the adult choir at church when I asked starting high school. I was the youngest one and was in it all of high school and quit for college and moving during a hurricane. I was probably gonna move, anyway ... my brother and mom were gonna stay so we didn't miss relationships and activities ... my dad had to get a new job somewhere else. I didn't do choir when I came home from college to stay, at least for awhile, because I was soo tired for a long time, to this day. I don't know why I haven't caught up on sleep loss of 10 years. I had a hard time at first and didn't think to post on online message boards when I had nothing to do. We did get a keyboard and I kept forgetting about karaoke. I knew a lot of songs from musicals and a few folk songs.
I think I will do the songs I already know, re-look up the Italian after I do the English ones. I suppose the English ones would help, anyway, since I don't speak Italian. I am interested in learning another|other language|s. So, the voice teacher in college said to like pick a language and that she still couldn't get hers, German, though she was in Germany for 20 years. That really confuses me because I thought I got it the first day. We only did much Italian, though, because Italian was the class they offered the 2nd semester, the 1st being a general get to know you kind of class... which was fun, but I always felt guilty because why would I be there as a music education major? I don't know about secondary instruments, but I took piano and organ, as well as voice. I auditioned for piano and organ, and I was allowed to major in either and, perhaps, if I had time to prepare, I would get in voice, judging from the other kids. I've gained a stronger voice from being allowed to sing in college.
17-18 hours of sleep
I needed to catch up fro the past 2 days. I finally got up because I felt myself twitching some from the psychiatric medicine.
Sunday, June 24, 2012
I meant!
telling us they don't mind if we do something we wouldn't do otherwise because it will backfire. I don't know where this started. Is there something we're supposed to do that we can't?
This is not a good time to be making suggestions.
Well, I found out what it was about. Pretty much, you're supposed to be as accurate as possible, or else you're out. Like, I posted online, but I wasn't satisfying enough, not valuable enough, yet. I feel better about myself now.
It's whoever calls the police first.
The other person didn't call so aren't honest about being with someone guilty.
I guess I can take a break from singing.
I have a long way to go. I can't do ballet much now, but I work out. I'm thinking of reading. I enjoyed reading the synopsizes of movies.
Moving
The whole problem with my life moving was people thought I should have done dance team, and the 2nd year wasn't as stimulating.
Telling someone they're wrong who's not
is very stimulating.
Well, somme people ... just go about thinking there's nothing to think about and that certain people can act how they want around them, I guess, and others can't who mean well. They don't see all sides of the issue. They are foreign to what they think they're teaching you, and it never made sense.
Well, somme people ... just go about thinking there's nothing to think about and that certain people can act how they want around them, I guess, and others can't who mean well. They don't see all sides of the issue. They are foreign to what they think they're teaching you, and it never made sense.
I don't want anyone to get hurt.
How can what I do hurt other people, just explaining when they're wrong? Like the ways it's not right. I never willed that on anyone. People just need to forget their problems. They are genuine, but all this is not how it's meant to be. Blame people who do things wrong. It always works.
I've realized that
I'm better off at home than in college.
I thought my dad was using they keyboard. I lost my piano, my home, and my memories in the flood, literally!
I might bring the keyboard in here. I am so lazy and yet don't feel up to looking up words in Italian.
I thought my dad was using they keyboard. I lost my piano, my home, and my memories in the flood, literally!
I might bring the keyboard in here. I am so lazy and yet don't feel up to looking up words in Italian.
The DVD Thing
I just wanted something to do I guess. I had a feeling. I guess that feeling was wrong. I don't know why. I think it was simply because I was told to do it. I mean, I'm allowed to. I mean, really, maybe it doesn't change anything. I guess I should have realized the situation. I have another situation. Kate Bush has released lots of new CDs, and I want to get a Nook next month and for some reason don't have much money. Also, I want to buy a book online, now. Anyway, iTunes lets you enjoy songs one at a time and still get a discount as you complete the CD. I don't have enough money! :( I don't have clothes! I wasted my money on stuff I don't like, proving I should have already bought these things. I've bought all of Viggo Mortensen's, well the beginning 10 or something, DVDs but have been living life just watching "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" and picking at other things to do somehow.
I'm thinking I've done something awful.
I think the problem is I will not live my life in limbo not talking about anything I want. I can't even do what I want in private what's agreed upon with another person. Anyway, I can shut up, but some things are important to know, and writing them out helps me. Who's gonna care? I can think it. I shouldn't, but it settles the issue for me. I thought it was right because I don't understand it. If someone doesn't want me to say something doesn't mean it's the right thing. It might be important. I can't think unless I think out loud, and I have a need to communicate. People are gonna find out, anyway, I mean like the things that are going on in general. I don't know how to deal with this, but I'm not rude in what I do. I was just treated wrongly myself, and there was no reason for it. Maybe, in a way, there was.
I think the mistake|s people made are like in punishing me for the "n" word thing. I can't believe the world. If you'll notice, I mean, I've said that they wanted to do it and they did. So what? I won't do it again because it's not cool. I'm just being treated sorta stupidly. It's not good for other people to live like this. I really see a lot in other people. I don't feel popular, but it's good, I don't want to be.
I'm thinking I've done something awful.
I think the problem is I will not live my life in limbo not talking about anything I want. I can't even do what I want in private what's agreed upon with another person. Anyway, I can shut up, but some things are important to know, and writing them out helps me. Who's gonna care? I can think it. I shouldn't, but it settles the issue for me. I thought it was right because I don't understand it. If someone doesn't want me to say something doesn't mean it's the right thing. It might be important. I can't think unless I think out loud, and I have a need to communicate. People are gonna find out, anyway, I mean like the things that are going on in general. I don't know how to deal with this, but I'm not rude in what I do. I was just treated wrongly myself, and there was no reason for it. Maybe, in a way, there was.
I think the mistake|s people made are like in punishing me for the "n" word thing. I can't believe the world. If you'll notice, I mean, I've said that they wanted to do it and they did. So what? I won't do it again because it's not cool. I'm just being treated sorta stupidly. It's not good for other people to live like this. I really see a lot in other people. I don't feel popular, but it's good, I don't want to be.
So, I was
and am well aware that sometimes I've gotten feelings growing up that I want to get it out, the worst of my personality, but that is not something I do, now nor on purpose! I am, in now ay a perv, and I respect what is set up in life. Too bad about the "n" word thing. Who cares about me, now? Well, what do people want to happen to me? Wait for some lunatic to kill me because I stand out because of the "n" word thing? Well, I guess I can get over it. Thanks, for broadcasting my true feelings in the matter.
Being Made Fun Of
I don't remember ... maybe it was my being like a classical|traditional I mean old-fashioned person and the "n" word thing that people sense from me... It was tough a bit. I just reacted in the end that I don't fashion up myself for anyone sexually, like look like a young person who has a typical look that shows they're like a doll version of their elders or something, or like a more stimulated, more warped version of their parents, like an overly happy version of an older generation.
Johnny Depp literally
wants everyone to forget about their family and staying young. He is saying that you're nothing if you're not famous now.
It - is - not time for me to "start" anything! :D Getting together with family who have caused me to get mad every time I see them somehow, in ways I forget and making me feel bad or is it just me? I haven't even seen my grandma up north since I was fif teen. I loved going up, but my life changed. I've been hibernating and had active summers in school.
It - is - not time for me to "start" anything! :D Getting together with family who have caused me to get mad every time I see them somehow, in ways I forget and making me feel bad or is it just me? I haven't even seen my grandma up north since I was fif teen. I loved going up, but my life changed. I've been hibernating and had active summers in school.
I always saw-
Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter as being like other people. I guess me also coming from a similar place as Johnny and having a non-Caucasian mom has taken its toll.
People are just interested in heritage. I know Ellen DeGeneres is from Metarie (sp?) and I'm from Slidell. I'm a Slidell person. Metarie is close, but it's very different. They're both suburbs of New Orleans.
People are just interested in heritage. I know Ellen DeGeneres is from Metarie (sp?) and I'm from Slidell. I'm a Slidell person. Metarie is close, but it's very different. They're both suburbs of New Orleans.
Whittling Me Away
like a pig preparing for its own slaughter.
*looks from side to side*
Okay, I can do this.
People are afraid to interact with me, and I want to know what they want of me. It's fun to feel nothing.
*looks from side to side*
Okay, I can do this.
People are afraid to interact with me, and I want to know what they want of me. It's fun to feel nothing.
I was thinking...
...So, yea, I know Renée Fleming moved to northwestern New York state, and Chloë Moretz also moved to New York but New York City, from Georgia, from Atlanta. So, she's only lived in major cities. My dad's family I think are only from southwestern New York but ancestrally and mostly from northwestern Pennsylvania.
I can't be too mad. I guess I'm just gonna have to be who I am. Wait, why did I say that?
I can't be too mad. I guess I'm just gonna have to be who I am. Wait, why did I say that?
So, I guess people need to basically
realize they don't do certain details that they should do.
I was thinking of race. I don't know that England seems so perfect. You never know what ethnicity someone is.
I grew up thinking that people were always always mad at me for not stretching what I do in that I was too good. I guess I just about had it at some point. If that person wants you to be bad to them then they do. Instead, the world is fooling you.
I was thinking of race. I don't know that England seems so perfect. You never know what ethnicity someone is.
I grew up thinking that people were always always mad at me for not stretching what I do in that I was too good. I guess I just about had it at some point. If that person wants you to be bad to them then they do. Instead, the world is fooling you.
Like My Dad
I think that my grandma doesn't actually tell you what she's doing to you and just does it. Just because of the "n" word thing, I think she has become more critical concerning me but does things she'd do anyway regardless of me. She acts sorry after she seems upset with me. My family questions my existence. That is completely inappropriate and out of the question. I hardly relate to my brother. It's big I let him have his life. I even go outwards from people I'm related to. I am a real person. I even live with magic. I see things in patterns. I do the right thing... I don't see what the big deal is, with someone, about a kid's existence. I feel a bit arrested about my brother having kids, like he's mad at me about something someone I know did... like I did it on purpose. He can chose to react how he wants. That's his fault, but in a way I guess it's really no one's fault.
I don't see ... well, I see people are excited to critique me and have trashed my life in some literal or abstract sense, literally.
I see that people don't care that they're not prepared to do something very complex. I am thinking of Chloë Moretz. She moved to NYC. She doesn't think and figure like me. Then, I'm thinking of Ellen DeGeneres. She doesn't, neither. I think I'm not getting quite right out of the show what seems important, thinking of things like this, which makes me concerned, about her.
So, people just don't want me to get attention.
Hm. I am curious.
I don't like this. I mean, people don't want me to exist. They think I am a sin and that all I deserve is Hell. All I can say is I don't approve of what all they do... :/ Hm. Maybe, I'm making some of it up. People just don't get I didn't want to do the "n" word thing and explained how it could be avoided, but I was convinced, literally, that words are just words. I would never use the "n" word on someone, but I thought someone since using the word gay wanted to get me to use the "n" word on their kid online. I think that them calling the older kid, a boy, gay, would affect them.
Well, ... I think a lot of people like me and admire me. People think what I do is just sin. I don't really want my life to be cheap. I want it to be real.
I am curious. There aren't many kids in my family my age nor older. I did not chose to be born. That's all.
People seem big on the idea that working is the only thing that matters.
People think that it's unfair I exist. I've always paved the way for others to get attention from those that I love. Now, people are trying to like get me not to take up space. I was in college.
It's funny, you know, I have 2 aunts on my dad's side, and they didn't have kids until after me because for some reason it seems they didn't marry and have kids younger. On my mom's side, I have an aunt who is 16 years older than me. She lives in Indonesia, and I asked my mom how many recently born sons she has, but she said she only had 3 when she had I think 5.
People have treated me like I'm a sin. Thank you so much for the "n" word situation, like I'm bad enough to represent I'd do that otherwise. It might not be tactful for me to say, but I'm just saying in general. It shouldn't be anyone's fault. Who knew? I did.
People have mistreated me all my life. It's like they think they're a person and I'm not.
Thinking, I can see now that maybe my life is fun. I can live with my parents if I want. It seems that my life is empty.
... You know ... Hey, if my life is a sin, then whose isn't?
It's funny, in my family my parents are closer to their families than me, though I live with them and go out with my dad, often. I don't know why it seems that ... I am very curious about the sexual relationship of my parents. You know, I don't feel much... Hm. Ever since that lady looked at me funnily when I was thinking a good thought I stopped feeling much.
I don't believe that I deserve anything bad. I've been mistreated, but I'm pretty much on target personality-wise compared to other people.
People just pick at what doesn't seem attractive in me.
PEOPLE I AM NOT A SIN.
People care about others more than me and don't realize that until they've done their deed.
I am not worthless. I have made it.
I had to make myself a person. Wow, do to me what you sin. It's no secret. Sometimes, you say things, when things are harder than they should be, but people have been picking at me like I don't mean anything. I do everything for a reason when I can't figure it out. Don't go in secret and be dishonest with me. I didn't do anything wrong. I know people who have. I guess people just don't want me to exist. Why not rat on some other person? Don't think you own me. I am not a sin, and even if I was had in sin it wouldn't matter. People need a guide, so they need me. How sick is that? I mean, it's funny they think that's not okay, that like if I got more attention people wouldn't be as jealous because they'd be more like me in ways of things they don't understand. People in this area ...
Ugh!
Even kids think they can outdo me, but I just chose not to ruin their life. I do things in silence!
I am curious that some people think they can control your life. It seems like it's people who know more about you. I wonder why I am so easy to control. I wanted to live life like everyone else, but it seems I was not bestowed with love, properly, like I've been tossed around emotionally.
If my parents had me in sin does not mean I can be tortured. You don't do this to anyone else, and it's all because of the pointless "n" word thing.
Wow, thanks for ruining my life. It's not my fault you are like complaining about your life.
Even my dad gets bored of me. In ways, he doesn't.
I'm mad now about the "n" word thing on my birthday. That lady. Ugh...
I'm wondering why my parents had me, and I guess it was to be proud of their kids and show off how our life is but still say like I don't count because I'm Chinese and Chinese are always good, like I wasn't good on my own. Like it's unfair to other kids. I guess people see others having kids and decide to follow and make their kids one step better. It's better in what they consider better, which is probably just a difference from other parents.
Now, I'm thinking. People seem to think I'm bad. I am thinking of something that happened as a coincidence or outside advising. It was something that was said that relates to this. I went to the concert of an Irish singer. I follow her online, but she doesn't post there much anymore. I hadn't gotten her Christmas CD yet because I never had enough money and was intimidated to ask my parents for any money. So, at the concert, my dad bought it for me. So, I didn't want to have her see I hadn't seen her CD yet because she'd recognize me. I had been posting on her site, too, which I assume no one cared about it'd seem, just to socialize as people do. So, maybe not the best experience, sharing things with her fans. So, anyway, my dad and aunt told me to get the Christmas CD signed, so I did. So, it wasn't really my fault. I didn't know quite how bad it was if I thought it was bad and I was told very much to get it signed. Now, people think I'm worthless and simple and have been able to read into me. It's like ...
Okay, so people because of the "n" word thing are going into in great length and experience that they, well can't get everything, but that they're in the right and I'm in the wrong. -Not to jump at anything: I know that's not what we learn is right, not what we learn in church, neither. I don't deserve to be treated like this. I knew what I was doing. It's hard on me, though, anyone would know.
Ah! I forgot what else I was going to say.
Oh, I don't believe ...
Oh, so you want to know why I brought up some things? I figured I was considered worthless for the CD thing, that I had no point in existing. It's because I was thought I was worthless. I don't know, though.
Fine, go ahead and call me a nigger. I'm not gonna be one. I'd rather be called one.
So, anyway, it seems people have always assured me when I inquired that I was good, but now they're secretly punishing me because they know I can figure myself out of any guilt. I never even did anything wrong on purpose. I did what I was supposed to do and was not told otherwise. People are too lazy to care about what bothers them.
In school, we didn't do much, neither.
So, I don't approve of the perverted messages I get and people thinking they can get away with saying they respect me. It's just because of the thing where I didn't feel well in college probably because people were going crazy over Tim Burton, Johnny Depp, and Danny Elfman for Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
I guess people will have to ... I dunno.
And then the "n" word thing. It seems all people want is to insult me. Why don't people get someone acted like they wanted to do it TO LEARN. I didn't do it at first because I was like okay I'll just get called that back, DUH. I don't even need to think about that. Yes, they wanted it. I wouldn't do it for anyone now, though, like to get me in trouble.
I really am not a bad person. I always cared that I was doing the right thing. I don't know why people are so racist against me.
People have always treated me like a nigger. It's very hard to not be affected because I was. My life wasn't so great. I don't know how to feel anymore, affectively. I feel better, though. Maybe, I need a break from what things were like. It's all because of the racism online and what happened in real life that I got kicked out of my major and voice lessons. I really believed my life was an experiment and then that things were magic. Still, there are reasons and I've sorta whipped the thinking into shape. You don't make it so that it's all set up you want someone to do something you don't want them to do that they can't tell. I wasn't able to think it through. It was in case I would do it by accident. It seems that people upon meeting me felt more encouraged to rub in feelings. I'll just have to ignore that and just hope no one affects my life. It's sick people think they can actually plot against me. I guess I'm just a good person.
I feel ignored because people have families. I'm not really with my parents so so much. I do it because it's good quality time. I am a worldly person, though, but it's true I don't get much in way of feelings in my time in the world and now no fun. I'm not sure in lieu what's wrong.
I used to go to clubs every night. I was well-liked.
I like all people a lot, but I feel I can't be trusted.
xp
I don't see ... well, I see people are excited to critique me and have trashed my life in some literal or abstract sense, literally.
I see that people don't care that they're not prepared to do something very complex. I am thinking of Chloë Moretz. She moved to NYC. She doesn't think and figure like me. Then, I'm thinking of Ellen DeGeneres. She doesn't, neither. I think I'm not getting quite right out of the show what seems important, thinking of things like this, which makes me concerned, about her.
So, people just don't want me to get attention.
Hm. I am curious.
I don't like this. I mean, people don't want me to exist. They think I am a sin and that all I deserve is Hell. All I can say is I don't approve of what all they do... :/ Hm. Maybe, I'm making some of it up. People just don't get I didn't want to do the "n" word thing and explained how it could be avoided, but I was convinced, literally, that words are just words. I would never use the "n" word on someone, but I thought someone since using the word gay wanted to get me to use the "n" word on their kid online. I think that them calling the older kid, a boy, gay, would affect them.
Well, ... I think a lot of people like me and admire me. People think what I do is just sin. I don't really want my life to be cheap. I want it to be real.
I am curious. There aren't many kids in my family my age nor older. I did not chose to be born. That's all.
People seem big on the idea that working is the only thing that matters.
People think that it's unfair I exist. I've always paved the way for others to get attention from those that I love. Now, people are trying to like get me not to take up space. I was in college.
It's funny, you know, I have 2 aunts on my dad's side, and they didn't have kids until after me because for some reason it seems they didn't marry and have kids younger. On my mom's side, I have an aunt who is 16 years older than me. She lives in Indonesia, and I asked my mom how many recently born sons she has, but she said she only had 3 when she had I think 5.
People have treated me like I'm a sin. Thank you so much for the "n" word situation, like I'm bad enough to represent I'd do that otherwise. It might not be tactful for me to say, but I'm just saying in general. It shouldn't be anyone's fault. Who knew? I did.
People have mistreated me all my life. It's like they think they're a person and I'm not.
Thinking, I can see now that maybe my life is fun. I can live with my parents if I want. It seems that my life is empty.
... You know ... Hey, if my life is a sin, then whose isn't?
It's funny, in my family my parents are closer to their families than me, though I live with them and go out with my dad, often. I don't know why it seems that ... I am very curious about the sexual relationship of my parents. You know, I don't feel much... Hm. Ever since that lady looked at me funnily when I was thinking a good thought I stopped feeling much.
I don't believe that I deserve anything bad. I've been mistreated, but I'm pretty much on target personality-wise compared to other people.
People just pick at what doesn't seem attractive in me.
PEOPLE I AM NOT A SIN.
People care about others more than me and don't realize that until they've done their deed.
I am not worthless. I have made it.
I had to make myself a person. Wow, do to me what you sin. It's no secret. Sometimes, you say things, when things are harder than they should be, but people have been picking at me like I don't mean anything. I do everything for a reason when I can't figure it out. Don't go in secret and be dishonest with me. I didn't do anything wrong. I know people who have. I guess people just don't want me to exist. Why not rat on some other person? Don't think you own me. I am not a sin, and even if I was had in sin it wouldn't matter. People need a guide, so they need me. How sick is that? I mean, it's funny they think that's not okay, that like if I got more attention people wouldn't be as jealous because they'd be more like me in ways of things they don't understand. People in this area ...
Ugh!
Even kids think they can outdo me, but I just chose not to ruin their life. I do things in silence!
I am curious that some people think they can control your life. It seems like it's people who know more about you. I wonder why I am so easy to control. I wanted to live life like everyone else, but it seems I was not bestowed with love, properly, like I've been tossed around emotionally.
If my parents had me in sin does not mean I can be tortured. You don't do this to anyone else, and it's all because of the pointless "n" word thing.
Wow, thanks for ruining my life. It's not my fault you are like complaining about your life.
Even my dad gets bored of me. In ways, he doesn't.
I'm mad now about the "n" word thing on my birthday. That lady. Ugh...
I'm wondering why my parents had me, and I guess it was to be proud of their kids and show off how our life is but still say like I don't count because I'm Chinese and Chinese are always good, like I wasn't good on my own. Like it's unfair to other kids. I guess people see others having kids and decide to follow and make their kids one step better. It's better in what they consider better, which is probably just a difference from other parents.
Now, I'm thinking. People seem to think I'm bad. I am thinking of something that happened as a coincidence or outside advising. It was something that was said that relates to this. I went to the concert of an Irish singer. I follow her online, but she doesn't post there much anymore. I hadn't gotten her Christmas CD yet because I never had enough money and was intimidated to ask my parents for any money. So, at the concert, my dad bought it for me. So, I didn't want to have her see I hadn't seen her CD yet because she'd recognize me. I had been posting on her site, too, which I assume no one cared about it'd seem, just to socialize as people do. So, maybe not the best experience, sharing things with her fans. So, anyway, my dad and aunt told me to get the Christmas CD signed, so I did. So, it wasn't really my fault. I didn't know quite how bad it was if I thought it was bad and I was told very much to get it signed. Now, people think I'm worthless and simple and have been able to read into me. It's like ...
Okay, so people because of the "n" word thing are going into in great length and experience that they, well can't get everything, but that they're in the right and I'm in the wrong. -Not to jump at anything: I know that's not what we learn is right, not what we learn in church, neither. I don't deserve to be treated like this. I knew what I was doing. It's hard on me, though, anyone would know.
Ah! I forgot what else I was going to say.
Oh, I don't believe ...
Oh, so you want to know why I brought up some things? I figured I was considered worthless for the CD thing, that I had no point in existing. It's because I was thought I was worthless. I don't know, though.
Fine, go ahead and call me a nigger. I'm not gonna be one. I'd rather be called one.
So, anyway, it seems people have always assured me when I inquired that I was good, but now they're secretly punishing me because they know I can figure myself out of any guilt. I never even did anything wrong on purpose. I did what I was supposed to do and was not told otherwise. People are too lazy to care about what bothers them.
In school, we didn't do much, neither.
So, I don't approve of the perverted messages I get and people thinking they can get away with saying they respect me. It's just because of the thing where I didn't feel well in college probably because people were going crazy over Tim Burton, Johnny Depp, and Danny Elfman for Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
I guess people will have to ... I dunno.
And then the "n" word thing. It seems all people want is to insult me. Why don't people get someone acted like they wanted to do it TO LEARN. I didn't do it at first because I was like okay I'll just get called that back, DUH. I don't even need to think about that. Yes, they wanted it. I wouldn't do it for anyone now, though, like to get me in trouble.
I really am not a bad person. I always cared that I was doing the right thing. I don't know why people are so racist against me.
People have always treated me like a nigger. It's very hard to not be affected because I was. My life wasn't so great. I don't know how to feel anymore, affectively. I feel better, though. Maybe, I need a break from what things were like. It's all because of the racism online and what happened in real life that I got kicked out of my major and voice lessons. I really believed my life was an experiment and then that things were magic. Still, there are reasons and I've sorta whipped the thinking into shape. You don't make it so that it's all set up you want someone to do something you don't want them to do that they can't tell. I wasn't able to think it through. It was in case I would do it by accident. It seems that people upon meeting me felt more encouraged to rub in feelings. I'll just have to ignore that and just hope no one affects my life. It's sick people think they can actually plot against me. I guess I'm just a good person.
I feel ignored because people have families. I'm not really with my parents so so much. I do it because it's good quality time. I am a worldly person, though, but it's true I don't get much in way of feelings in my time in the world and now no fun. I'm not sure in lieu what's wrong.
I used to go to clubs every night. I was well-liked.
I like all people a lot, but I feel I can't be trusted.
xp
Things aren't always as they seem.
So, I tried to look like someone and I found it was impossible. I looked different but had the same attitude. Then, I tried doing it more physically and didn't have any of the attitude down.
Pensive
I thought that to meet people you had to have a reason. It's not just because you're lucky. So, what happens to people who do just meet to meet compared with ones they meet later?
I was wondering because I was concerned. I was thinking of meeting Tim Burton, but he's busy with his family. I noticed that he acts like his son, in a lot of ways but in a way that makes it kind of in fun, like how you make things tacky for fun. I notice he's like his daughter like he likes to make her feel really good, haha, as papas do.
So, a lot of people want to meet Tim Burton. I'm not dying to. I think I should be able to work with him, but I do music and he doesn't. He works with Danny Elfman, a composer, pianist, singer... I posted online I wanted to work with him, like for a project with Tim... Well, I also like to draw. Singers can act or chose to. I wonder - yes, he's worked with dancing. I watched all his movies, so I know what to say about him, same with Johnny Depp and some others. I found it wasn't really necessary|tangible to watch all the old movies of an actor. I go to the movies to see modern movies, and that's enough of a schedule of staring watching a screen.
Perhaps, I'm not ready, but I know if I did something for money I'd have money to get myself ready for something bigger. I feel kinda stuck, but I'm seeing the wear and tear of my life. We don't make enough money, and I'm not fit for a job. I'm half Chinese.
I guess I started this rant because I was tickled at the love for Nell Burton, the daughter of Tim and his partner Helena Bonham Carter, though they're not married.
I don't like feeling bad about myself, though. I realize Tim is a great director, but I'm not *shit* *looks from side to side* I feel trashier all the time, I guess, though I am getting healthier.
It's funny how Tim, well, he fell in love with Helena Bonham Carter, obviously. He spotted her out.
Tim says that he can be like totally made to feel certain ways without his doing it. It's funny how he seems the opposite. In some ways, he's not all there. I feel the same way about Ellen DeGeneres. They are both born around the same time of year and are from the dead south about. I just now realized that Chloë Moretz also from the dead south, same latitude as these 2, is like them, though she moved to New York City. However, I've always lived in the south. I've only lived in northern Ohio for maybe 2 months. I was doing a semester there but had to go home because of how I was. I totally transformed myself.
I've been in Orlando ... and I can't see with me how doing something to get it over with makes me not do it again. I'm glad it works for other people. They can do whatever they want. I find that the only thing is that it's popped into my head. It hasn't always like that. The south is where I've always lived. I don't feel like I'm connected to it, but Florida really is considered like New York.
I was wondering because I was concerned. I was thinking of meeting Tim Burton, but he's busy with his family. I noticed that he acts like his son, in a lot of ways but in a way that makes it kind of in fun, like how you make things tacky for fun. I notice he's like his daughter like he likes to make her feel really good, haha, as papas do.
So, a lot of people want to meet Tim Burton. I'm not dying to. I think I should be able to work with him, but I do music and he doesn't. He works with Danny Elfman, a composer, pianist, singer... I posted online I wanted to work with him, like for a project with Tim... Well, I also like to draw. Singers can act or chose to. I wonder - yes, he's worked with dancing. I watched all his movies, so I know what to say about him, same with Johnny Depp and some others. I found it wasn't really necessary|tangible to watch all the old movies of an actor. I go to the movies to see modern movies, and that's enough of a schedule of staring watching a screen.
Perhaps, I'm not ready, but I know if I did something for money I'd have money to get myself ready for something bigger. I feel kinda stuck, but I'm seeing the wear and tear of my life. We don't make enough money, and I'm not fit for a job. I'm half Chinese.
I guess I started this rant because I was tickled at the love for Nell Burton, the daughter of Tim and his partner Helena Bonham Carter, though they're not married.
I don't like feeling bad about myself, though. I realize Tim is a great director, but I'm not *shit* *looks from side to side* I feel trashier all the time, I guess, though I am getting healthier.
It's funny how Tim, well, he fell in love with Helena Bonham Carter, obviously. He spotted her out.
Tim says that he can be like totally made to feel certain ways without his doing it. It's funny how he seems the opposite. In some ways, he's not all there. I feel the same way about Ellen DeGeneres. They are both born around the same time of year and are from the dead south about. I just now realized that Chloë Moretz also from the dead south, same latitude as these 2, is like them, though she moved to New York City. However, I've always lived in the south. I've only lived in northern Ohio for maybe 2 months. I was doing a semester there but had to go home because of how I was. I totally transformed myself.
I've been in Orlando ... and I can't see with me how doing something to get it over with makes me not do it again. I'm glad it works for other people. They can do whatever they want. I find that the only thing is that it's popped into my head. It hasn't always like that. The south is where I've always lived. I don't feel like I'm connected to it, but Florida really is considered like New York.
I got so agitated.
This guy was drumming when I was looking at pizza. He was staring at me. He acted like I was ... shit! An older guy tried to look sympathetic with me, but I still reacted. The girl acted like I was nothing after awhile, too. I regret it now. My dad said the food there wasn't good. They didn't make pepperoni calzones|strombolis this time. He doesn't want to eat there anymore. I got 2 calzones|strombolis before. My dad took me there before we watched a play showing at the movie theater, Frankenstein. It's neat because Tim Burton is coming out with Frankenweenie October 5th.
How shall I say this?
People are mad at me because they think their hidden racism is okay. They don't feel I feel enough for them. Like I mean like I care. Like, I technically give into their superiority, but I don't agree I was given any opportunity to be who I was!
How I Sort My Pictures
So, I take the ones that look good, but if they all look the same even if they're good I skip them.
Why do people who do ballet
look different in how much you'd think they should have done what they've done?
*looks side to side*
*looks side to side*
Why would I get in trouble for
thinking something I didn't think. I hope that thought doesn't escape you. Maybe, it does. I mean, like, I did something, said something, but didn't think what you think I thought when I said it and didn't mean it in a way that could be meant.
Why would people think
your goal is perverted and that you *haven't done it yet* and therefore aren't ready to see anyone?
People who think being ...
like where you exchange ideals and values rather than set yourself on the ideal you actually believe in ... or are obviously "jealous" of ... I guess it's important to set your standards. Some people do things like they mean it, though. I don't find it funny because my life isn't dished to me on a plate, anymore. I think people should learn to change their lives.
So
you have to be able to do things, change things about yourself and act differently within different times, so you desire?
If I could take back one thing
it would be not to fall for someone wanting me to call their kid the "n" word online, which you know is always twisted, I mean the reasoning behind what people do here. :|
Why do people even
test your reasons to want to be famous? I mean in a way that feels like your life is over. I'm not really famous!!!
Suffering
You shouldn't make the WRONG people suffer. Sure, you not doing something might be okay sometimes. It depends on your intention and how you do it. I don't see why some people feel so knocked out in their dreams. That just shows what they're not ready for and they've convinced others out of ever doing things they want to do!
Don't do something *early* or whatever just because bad people suffer because you're calling upon good people to do things they can't do. In the end, they will be the ones who die. Let the military suffer. That's sad, but it's true. You can't go twisting others's private dreams, like saying it's moot. I see people do that a lot. You have to be very careful how you do things. Every time you do something new, something happens. Some things weren't really right to begin with and should be changed, though. I know that. I was too hardy to get out of a hard class in high school, and my life was ruined! My family! Everything! Ev ery thing!!!
My priority in fact, after disabled, went to military. I just can't grasp the concept that people are so stupid that we send out the military and they die, even more and more at times. You might think that certain people won't commit suicide, won't get killed, but there are some things that could get innocent people killed who aren't in the military and who don't do drugs. It's obvious the bad people cause our men to die in troops. They aren't set right and mess up because of others. That doesn't mean they're worthless. They chose to die. So, I said to let the military die because someone has to die and it shouldn't be people who aren't in the military. I'm saying you can't think that you're saving others when you jeopardize some others's lives, and yes that would involve the military. They die for you. That's what they're trained to do, sadly. I really have them I think as my 2nd priority with the 3rd people old people in nursing homes. I won't give to the poor!
Don't do something *early* or whatever just because bad people suffer because you're calling upon good people to do things they can't do. In the end, they will be the ones who die. Let the military suffer. That's sad, but it's true. You can't go twisting others's private dreams, like saying it's moot. I see people do that a lot. You have to be very careful how you do things. Every time you do something new, something happens. Some things weren't really right to begin with and should be changed, though. I know that. I was too hardy to get out of a hard class in high school, and my life was ruined! My family! Everything! Ev ery thing!!!
My priority in fact, after disabled, went to military. I just can't grasp the concept that people are so stupid that we send out the military and they die, even more and more at times. You might think that certain people won't commit suicide, won't get killed, but there are some things that could get innocent people killed who aren't in the military and who don't do drugs. It's obvious the bad people cause our men to die in troops. They aren't set right and mess up because of others. That doesn't mean they're worthless. They chose to die. So, I said to let the military die because someone has to die and it shouldn't be people who aren't in the military. I'm saying you can't think that you're saving others when you jeopardize some others's lives, and yes that would involve the military. They die for you. That's what they're trained to do, sadly. I really have them I think as my 2nd priority with the 3rd people old people in nursing homes. I won't give to the poor!
People think I give suggestions.
I so do not. There are a lot of protocols set up in this country and the others. It all has to do with playing with words and demands that you take it. I don't make fun of others.
The fact that I can't make a point is definitely untrue. People think if I mess up they're better when they've messed up more times. If they haven't, then good. It just seems like others do. Anyone can see that. It's like they're thinking of some obscure thing we don't know about that they did wrong in private.
The fact that I can't make a point is definitely untrue. People think if I mess up they're better when they've messed up more times. If they haven't, then good. It just seems like others do. Anyone can see that. It's like they're thinking of some obscure thing we don't know about that they did wrong in private.
PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO BE THEMSELVES
There is no, oh, I'm not from a modern place. I'm also from a backwards place. Backwards meaning doesn't contend.
Like, the whole country is upset.
Like, the whole country is upset.
Um.
I know that I'm okay and don't need anything of my life extracted and presented. That's just silly nonsense. :|
Well, it is important what you do and say, but it's the same reason it'd be important to everybody|anyone else.
Well, it is important what you do and say, but it's the same reason it'd be important to everybody|anyone else.
Ruined!
I should have been given to a different mother.
I swear, my mom must think I'm shit and alchol, shit in general but alcohol because my dad's dad drank. That's so insulting. You just don't understand. Why want me to think LIKE THAT? Don't get mad at her. She didn't mean it like that, really. I think she thinks she can read into my brother, too, that he's the same as me and works the same and makes him the opposite of what I want. You know, just to stimulate him. :| I don't agree at all with contending to the world. I don't agree at all for caring about other people who want to insult you. I do not need to rehearse it. :|
I swear, my mom must think I'm shit and alchol, shit in general but alcohol because my dad's dad drank. That's so insulting. You just don't understand. Why want me to think LIKE THAT? Don't get mad at her. She didn't mean it like that, really. I think she thinks she can read into my brother, too, that he's the same as me and works the same and makes him the opposite of what I want. You know, just to stimulate him. :| I don't agree at all with contending to the world. I don't agree at all for caring about other people who want to insult you. I do not need to rehearse it. :|
Why do you think it is okay
and tangible that someone could be mistreated by you? If you thought that, wouldn't you just care about that they're okay? I'm just wondering. I wasn't able to word this how I wanted.
I kinda forget
oh nevermind.
Um, hard to think of without letting slip my mind...
Okay, I can see one thing ...
Um ... Okay ... I guess things, however trivial, end up being dealt with.
Um, hard to think of without letting slip my mind...
Okay, I can see one thing ...
Um ... Okay ... I guess things, however trivial, end up being dealt with.
There are certain things in how you deal with a person
that can't be just shy of calling them the "n" word.
Why can't you people, like, all realize that..
..I'm always right, in the end! I can figure this out! I admit I've had some technical trial and error issues. You didn't help me out enough, though, and didn't seem to let my life steer in the same way!!
They have this desire
to control every facet of your life. They flip around what you've done to them, I'm guessing, except the situation is different, which is what is actually at least also important or important to just be okay. It shouldn't be bland, though. I shouldn't be told I'm very different in a way that people can't get to me and then think I could actually mess up my whole life without doing much and then saying I'm like everyone else when everyone else is mean to me.
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