I spent $53 at Wal-Mart, and my mom paid $28 of it because I ran out. I was gonna put the stuff back but ended up not. It was not outwardly a big deal, and my mom seemed happy to do it.
Florida has a high tax rate, 6%.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
School!
I may be a "full-time" student in the fall if I want..
I think I'm going back to Music Education.
We stopped at a community college, and it's 4 hours for 6 semesters, which is 2 years including summer.
I said I was interested in Musical Theater or Theater and later added Music. They mentioned Music Education, which wasn't on the website. Good thing my mom took me there! I was like I was just interested in the majors, my mom took me here. Can you help me pick a major? She gave me the sheets for Music Education and Musical Theater. She asked some courses I wanted to take for General Studies, and I chose Arts and Ideas Honors and General Psychology Honors. There was also a course in Arts and Culture Honors and something else. The easiest for my in college and school was arts and then philosophy. It's easier than history and English. It's also easier than math. ,:|
She asked if I needed any accommodations, and I said transportation maybe. She said they didn't provide that but were connected to the bus service here.
I think I'm going back to Music Education.
We stopped at a community college, and it's 4 hours for 6 semesters, which is 2 years including summer.
I said I was interested in Musical Theater or Theater and later added Music. They mentioned Music Education, which wasn't on the website. Good thing my mom took me there! I was like I was just interested in the majors, my mom took me here. Can you help me pick a major? She gave me the sheets for Music Education and Musical Theater. She asked some courses I wanted to take for General Studies, and I chose Arts and Ideas Honors and General Psychology Honors. There was also a course in Arts and Culture Honors and something else. The easiest for my in college and school was arts and then philosophy. It's easier than history and English. It's also easier than math. ,:|
She asked if I needed any accommodations, and I said transportation maybe. She said they didn't provide that but were connected to the bus service here.
He does have significant improvements.
He was different from me in key ways that are too complicated for me to describe. He's changed, though, and seems less complicated now. He is very complicated, but it's not in a way I can connect with. He's in college, goes on trips, and does student work. I'm struggling and was out of school early for 5 years.
So, I was wondering...
...if my brother looked like me as a child when I was a bit younger, why didn't he look like me later? I started looking different after I quit gymnastics. I guess he looked different when we moved to Louisiana. Doi. He started martial arts, at some point, too.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Here are my - actually 2 - posts about death.
I wonder who really deserves to die. Hopefully, no one deserves to die unless they are an old person in bed in a warm home|cottage. 
Why can't people understand that! I'm sure arrangements can be made. 
What if most of the people in the world died.
Wow, a person can deserve death? They are always trying to defend people with bad backgrounds.
And they say people are just like that if they're mean. That's all the world is today! 
Why can't people understand that! I'm sure arrangements can be made. What if most of the people in the world died.
Wow, a person can deserve death? They are always trying to defend people with bad backgrounds.
And they say people are just like that if they're mean. That's all the world is today! I think 3 people have almost gotten me killed.
That's why death is coming to my mind. I don't want anyone to die! D':
Here's the post about death.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1345836/board/nest/199715702?d=199754117#199754117
Last time I had the word "nigger" in my head it came out. So, I just wanted to clarify that no one should die nor be harmed nor tortured.
Last time I had the word "nigger" in my head it came out. So, I just wanted to clarify that no one should die nor be harmed nor tortured.
People are getting onto my case.
They think since I'm a perfectionist they can play with me. It's probably because they were just ignoring me before.
IMDb
I was posting about who's gonna die because it's a thought in my mind I'm supposed to get out before it develops into something serious because it feels like I'm gonna die if I became an actor!
Oh boo hoo!
I wasn't a dangerous nor mean person. Why act like you want me to call you "stupid" and "nigger" just to ruin my rep so you could present it to the world?
My mom's been so careful.
Slowly adding fuel to the fire so as not to explode! It's been her obsession!
I feel sorry for my dad.
He's probably hurt about what he's done. My mom probably got mad, but my dad didn't seem to hurt her when she called and I went to the mental hospital. He wasn't expecting her to get me to break me out into a fight.
I mean, like I thought he was making stimulating sounds in a weird way to apply to someone I care about. I thought it was because he was done talking to my grandma, but who knows what decisions went up.
I mean, like I thought he was making stimulating sounds in a weird way to apply to someone I care about. I thought it was because he was done talking to my grandma, but who knows what decisions went up.
"The Ellen DeGeneres Show" - The JCPenney Dance Dares
http://youtu.be/km78oiLUqTY
0:50-0:53
I really like the big group dancing. It was neat that they got together! I feel like I should have been doing this when I was at the mall on Memorial Day. I could shimmy me way up those staircases.
0:50-0:53
I really like the big group dancing. It was neat that they got together! I feel like I should have been doing this when I was at the mall on Memorial Day. I could shimmy me way up those staircases.
I guess I'm cool with my grandma.
I just don't know what was going on. It didn't seem like something that would be done in light of the situation, that kind of thing.
My mom seems to know everything.
If I knew more, maybe I would spend more time being fascinated with myself.
It seems she wanted me to cower to my father because he had black hair. I remember I got mad. I think I had a pout face. She kept seeming to think that, and it was the same response, no. But, I still wanted my hair fair..
It seems she wanted me to cower to my father because he had black hair. I remember I got mad. I think I had a pout face. She kept seeming to think that, and it was the same response, no. But, I still wanted my hair fair..
My Hair
It seems like I liked dark hair, but I guess I didn't go to the playground as much and went to gymnastics and it got dark in between.
My Dad
He seems fine in ways, but there was something he was not supposed to do because it actually matters. I don't think it's funny to seem like you're thinking of applying stimulation to someone and someone nice who doesn't deserve it, in a bad way. I thought he was listening to my grandma. I don't really see how that fits in. It just seems like something is missing from our lives. I guess it's all that new stuff by Tim Burton because it's not in the mainstream though it is so appealing.
It seems like something my mom does.
Can't Figure Things OutOhh. So, I'm supposed to accept that, that people are entering my lives, too. I mean, the way my grandma seems to have influenced bad things to happen when I needed a break from talking to her because partly shes seems tired of talking to me, anyway. Actually, it's so I can get some time with my family and alone, I mean my parents and when my brother's here on summer break.
I'm sorry about that. Do you need any help? Oh, so you're lying. You did it, on purpose.
So, I guess I get it. It seems like something my mom does.
Instead of recommending me out of the system
they could have improved it. I could have quit myself, later. I probably would have. Instead, I got all bitchy and crappy. I kept coming back trying to figure out how to think again.
College Major
It seems like I'm done.
I'm wondering, my brother is almost done but what he should be doing. I thought business was the way to go, but I went into music!
I'm wondering, my brother is almost done but what he should be doing. I thought business was the way to go, but I went into music!
So, you just wait around and call me stupid?
Even though, in certain kinds of ways I come up with all the original ideas? I can live with that. I know I don't really come up with all the original ideas. I said in certain kinds of ways. :|
So, let's see.
I didn't call anyone stupid or anything. I just expressed my pain in other people's suffering. I can see how this is, though. I just want out! I just want to be innocent!
I see my mom did it
because of something similar my dad did, though. How perverted is that? I have things to do and don't need to be stopped by them. I'm starting to wonder if I can take care of myself mentally or if they do.
It's a complicated kind of racism.
And I managed to dodge the bullets, so don't blow up the situation, again, or try to get creative to see if you can stimulate someone!
I guess I can be cool with everyone...
Perhaps, the right esteem is not in store in light of recent events? I just want to cover the topics, if you didn't realize that.
I might be okay with some peopole, but my parents may not be all the time...
...I'm not okay with the things people have been doing related to me. I don't really know who to trust because it seems like a losing battle for no good reason with certain people.
Can't Figure Things Out
I'm sorry about that. Do you need any help? Oh, so you're lying. You did it, on purpose.
My parents can't moniter me on the internet.
They don't have any logic in the matter, at least my mom. They never do anything, online.
So, I was eating and couldn't blog.
Oh my gosh, I'm seeing lots of sparkly stars. I'm pretty mad.
So, it seems my mom is also trying to influence the inhabitants of Central Florida to become undignified. I had to avoid using all these curse words. I thought of the "n" word in one case and had to couple the thought off as a joke. So, I'm not that dumb. If someone is nice to me I don't try to hurt them.
So, it seems my mom is also trying to influence the inhabitants of Central Florida to become undignified. I had to avoid using all these curse words. I thought of the "n" word in one case and had to couple the thought off as a joke. So, I'm not that dumb. If someone is nice to me I don't try to hurt them.
At least I dodged the bullets.
Something like that. I just simply said I wasn't happy with what happened. I don't like people manipulating my lives and somehow my relationships. My parents will do anything to me that I know of that someone else wants to do to punish me for the "n" word thing even though they're too dumb to know they sent me a signal that they wanted me to do it.
Medicine?
Perhaps, I'm mad because I didn't tell my dad to get the smaller dosage of medicine and then didn't take the larger dosage. I said he could get it later on my birthday weekend, as a favor, but was too inhibited to take that large dosage, again. I should have split it but didn't even think about that for some reason...
Letting off Steam
I guess I got upset watching "The Ellen DeGeneres Show." She's really smart, but it just rekindled a fire...
I thought people knew that they should listen to me and that
I can make my own decisions. It's true! I care.
Get this - LOL?
"The message boards system is currently running in read only mode. Edits cannot be made to profiles."
I now have 2 IMDb accounts, and I link the other 1 on the profiles. I had 1 before. I think I need 3.
Stop acting like I did something wrong.
Don't call me a nigger. If you treat me like this, I can call you whatever I want!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't, but don't rat on me for the morals I have of that word. I thought they wanted me to do it, anyway, but I wasn't gonna.
Skirting Around
My dad and his sisters are like their mother. They do something wrong and then act like they're sorry. Well, I've seen them get in trouble.
After my dad talked to my grandma, it sounded like he called me a nigger! Then, during a movie, maybe 3|4 in or if anything a little more, he acted like he was stimulating a boy I talk to from England that he knows I talk to. It wasn't just a little thing, but I guess he cowered from his act, a little. What's worse is when he was done and I went through it on my blog or from talking to him he was convinced he did something wrong. We had had an okay day. He yelled at me in between sounding like he was calling me a nigger and acting like he was stimulating the boy! Why can't I get away with doing away with this nonsense? Of course, it was like sorta taken back the way he called me a nigger. Give it a rest, people! Why can I then not call you something? Why did my dad listen to my grandma? Also, he has me stay on pills I don't need that made my female thing whittle down to nothing, and they bat at me for their own problems with their son! It might seem like it's over. This isn't the 1st time people have played around with over-pleasuring this white boy. I did everything to deserve respect and not to be called anything for my race when trying to make a conversation about race in general. My dad keeps saying no one wants to talk about race. He's sarcastic like his sisters, were, and my grandma apparently is if she influenced him to do all that. Sometimes, he's acted like he can suddenly allude to my being 1|2 Chinese and barking at me for it! This is unbelievable. Thanks for changing the world for the better, Tim Burton and Johnny Depp! My dad is getting in a better mood, but he still did it and believes there is no consequence. So, now he listens to the prestige of my mom and not me. He does, in a way. He's the one who decided to carry this out. It sounded like he was just relaying what happened with my grandma. These people in my life are so sarcastic. I made a point that Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter would call their son gay and in public, so it was proof they WANTED me to have fun and call their daughter the "n" word online. Instead, they think because this boy has called people who are mean to him retarded that they can do this weird kind of pleasure thinking about him. Ooh, the animals will think then what if we did that to Christina. Sometimes, I experience stimulation looking at pictures of spoiled kids, but I don't actually defame them. This doesn't make sense. This boy is innocent. He is extra-good and doesn't deserve to be overly-pleasured in a perverted fashion! I might experience some satisfaction if we could turn this around, but I hope it just stops. I want people to listen to me! Stop treating me like I am more retarded than you! Stop coming in and taking advantage of me and changing my life. Ooh, I just saw a big white ghost on the side of my left eye. A thick opaque one. I actually saw a ghost earlier today, too.
After my dad talked to my grandma, it sounded like he called me a nigger! Then, during a movie, maybe 3|4 in or if anything a little more, he acted like he was stimulating a boy I talk to from England that he knows I talk to. It wasn't just a little thing, but I guess he cowered from his act, a little. What's worse is when he was done and I went through it on my blog or from talking to him he was convinced he did something wrong. We had had an okay day. He yelled at me in between sounding like he was calling me a nigger and acting like he was stimulating the boy! Why can't I get away with doing away with this nonsense? Of course, it was like sorta taken back the way he called me a nigger. Give it a rest, people! Why can I then not call you something? Why did my dad listen to my grandma? Also, he has me stay on pills I don't need that made my female thing whittle down to nothing, and they bat at me for their own problems with their son! It might seem like it's over. This isn't the 1st time people have played around with over-pleasuring this white boy. I did everything to deserve respect and not to be called anything for my race when trying to make a conversation about race in general. My dad keeps saying no one wants to talk about race. He's sarcastic like his sisters, were, and my grandma apparently is if she influenced him to do all that. Sometimes, he's acted like he can suddenly allude to my being 1|2 Chinese and barking at me for it! This is unbelievable. Thanks for changing the world for the better, Tim Burton and Johnny Depp! My dad is getting in a better mood, but he still did it and believes there is no consequence. So, now he listens to the prestige of my mom and not me. He does, in a way. He's the one who decided to carry this out. It sounded like he was just relaying what happened with my grandma. These people in my life are so sarcastic. I made a point that Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter would call their son gay and in public, so it was proof they WANTED me to have fun and call their daughter the "n" word online. Instead, they think because this boy has called people who are mean to him retarded that they can do this weird kind of pleasure thinking about him. Ooh, the animals will think then what if we did that to Christina. Sometimes, I experience stimulation looking at pictures of spoiled kids, but I don't actually defame them. This doesn't make sense. This boy is innocent. He is extra-good and doesn't deserve to be overly-pleasured in a perverted fashion! I might experience some satisfaction if we could turn this around, but I hope it just stops. I want people to listen to me! Stop treating me like I am more retarded than you! Stop coming in and taking advantage of me and changing my life. Ooh, I just saw a big white ghost on the side of my left eye. A thick opaque one. I actually saw a ghost earlier today, too.
Concerned
How did people get precedence not thinking everything is positive and logical? I pretty much laid down the facts. There are appropriate ways of behaving and inappropriate ways of behaving.
LOL
I went to get some toilet paper, and there are some things laid out. I am kinda physical, but it's like ooh. I somehow made it across in one leap, but I knocked something over on the way back. I mean, it wasn't like an ant hill or island or anything, but for some reason I just didn't feel like I could do it, this time.
It's all because of the "n" word thing.
I'm figuring out what I need. I don't feel I'm a dangerous person.
I'm not really being negative
in light of the situation. I don't need to be flogged for feeling bad.
People are still lying to themselves about me.
Well, I can do whatever I want back, as long as it is legal! Don't test me!
Some people's minds won't get off things.
And I'm the one who's not supposed to sort out my reactions.
I don't need to go through anyone's laundry list
as a punishment. I know people would attack me more if I did anything to them now, but I could justify it.
Ah h h h ~ Florida niggers!
That's me. It's not because I'm Native American.
Sometimes, you go way too far. I feel like a perv! It's not a place that's all that physically satisfying. In a way, it feels somewhat grounded, though, if you know what I mean.
I just keep finding improved methods of releasing my steam. I wish I could do it hands down. I don't know what's become of me.
A h h h ! I bet it's pretty shocking to a foreigner. To me, it was depressing. I felt my weaknesses.
It's like woah this place is deadbeat. I don't see an escape.
Sometimes, you go way too far. I feel like a perv! It's not a place that's all that physically satisfying. In a way, it feels somewhat grounded, though, if you know what I mean.
I just keep finding improved methods of releasing my steam. I wish I could do it hands down. I don't know what's become of me.
A h h h ! I bet it's pretty shocking to a foreigner. To me, it was depressing. I felt my weaknesses.
It's like woah this place is deadbeat. I don't see an escape.
Teetering on Meaningless Punishments
People forget how they got to where they came from and don't punish everyone for their worth.
Not Achieving the Impossible at a Certain Point of Life
No justification in the end.
How ... Do people know|guess ... like if something is calculated to be impossible, how can they actually rope the entire situation?
I suppose there exists individual lives. Different people have different goals set out for them.
How ... Do people know|guess ... like if something is calculated to be impossible, how can they actually rope the entire situation?
I suppose there exists individual lives. Different people have different goals set out for them.
It seems like people's purposes
in some if not in all things to do something no one can really emulate. Surely, people shouldn't have problems with their own fortes, if indeed they are the fortes they set out to conquer.
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
I hate people.
Why do they code in something to happen to you in the future? That's not what life's about!!!
People thought they could coat this issue...
...get me to say the "n" word so you think you have a reason for attacking me. You're not even supposed to attack people in prison, though they are serving their sentence.
I had a good life before this!
People find reason to attack me in public by like crossing in front of me in a funny way or rubbing their hand or making noises in a way that's annoying.
Ghost
A sponge totally jumped off the edge of the sink in the kitchen today when I was cleaning. I wasn't looking at it.
A Candy-Colored Life With Rose-Colored Glasses
Some people don't realize real problems! They don't identify it, I mean. I wonder what happens.
I just have to admit my parents participate in the world or are affected by it because of that whereas I chose to ignore it now.
I just have to admit my parents participate in the world or are affected by it because of that whereas I chose to ignore it now.
When I Mean Problems
I guess in my last post I meant trifles of misunderstandings that turn into something big and complex but never fully solved.
Stupid
Solving problems shouldn't happen at the tick marks of feeling uncomfortable and reacting.
I was gonna say something else on a slightly different topic but forget right now. Oh yea, I'm paving the way for a normal life in Central Florida.
I was gonna say something else on a slightly different topic but forget right now. Oh yea, I'm paving the way for a normal life in Central Florida.
Pretty much
my family doesn't know how to get anything done, but I obviously do. She doesn't usually say things that linger like this for a small initial reason. She thinks maybe I never got tired of her. People seem to have issues with how much she respects other people, but she is well-built, just not totally European in a way most people are, I guess. It's not even about if she's stimulating. She seems to want to separate me from the people I like who are rather iconic. I pushed her playfully because she was getting onto me, and I find that gay.
So, something little is actually turning into something pretty big.
I see lots of things about my parents that aren't as good as me, focusing more on my mom I suppose since it seems to be her idea.
Tim Burton might not be genuine to all his fans.
I don't know for sure, and I'm mad because my dad acted like he was stimulating someone in a bad way that I care about. Also, my mom has disturbed me about my current relationship|s, as well. She thinks if she says something maybe it will have to be taken care of so leaves little droppings of things if I am not being silly sorry over the "n" word thing, which has taken its toll on me.
Contagious
People are expecting you to die for them and be your slaves. Why don't we put the stamp on it?
Screaming Banshees
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/banshee
Some people command the attention of millions. They do it on purpose, but they are allowed to not think and just react.
Do you know or ever heard of this everyday thing where people will rub in relationships in ways they shouldn't? It's like it was something special for someone else but now it's not? Some people are good with people and juggling these things somehow. They seem to have some issues. I go by some logic. Um, I don't want this to keep popping up in my personal life. Pretty much, I don't mind if someone wants attention. I don't like people who play with thoughts to make them painful and stupid. I can say what I want about them and command respect. I need to talk about things. I feel better if I post them in a blog. It kind of gets a lot of views. That way, posting online, people might venture in here and react to it when they post to me. Some people might like the lyrical background I have in style.
I do have one thing down in life and that is to try to be appealing in a European way. I'm not quite sure exactly all the reasons other people have for liking European things.
Pretty much, I can accept things, but if something goes wrong I usually end up posting about it. Maybe, I need to learn to think, again. I have problems and can't think to myself about things like this. Without writing them down. I actually used to write a lot more complexly than this. I just didn't socialize on the internet. I did assignments and wrote e-mails. I write better, now, though and perhaps more easily understood.
In ways, I don't feel safe, but I know it's not my fault and so I will R.I.P. but will not kill myself. I think the police wanted me dead. They didn't come to the scene of the crime. I heard some gunshots. They didn't do much I think when I called about something online. I feel pretty safe as I am now. I just had goals like to be a movie star! I think everyone should consider acting or modeling. Girls should consider modeling, guys acting. Some girls don't want to model. Models can become movie stars!
So, I just find that it feels funny when you're followed, but it's okay, just something to take note of I guess. I don't really ask for attention. I don't like when I do get my expected attention that it gets taken away just because to be racist or mean or something. I guess I'll just have to accept what comes my way but not do these things myself? I find that people hate me for no reason and think they can take liberty over me when feelings like that, that I can do something and you can't, shouldn't exist. I don't know where things like this came from. That's just sick. People often swoon over my parents, I know, and leave me in the brush. It's actually the opposite, people feel warm about my parents yet find me more fun. I'm simply wondering about the message. I always am open for people to get attention but not to put me down in the process, like I'm still cool.
Some people command the attention of millions. They do it on purpose, but they are allowed to not think and just react.
Do you know or ever heard of this everyday thing where people will rub in relationships in ways they shouldn't? It's like it was something special for someone else but now it's not? Some people are good with people and juggling these things somehow. They seem to have some issues. I go by some logic. Um, I don't want this to keep popping up in my personal life. Pretty much, I don't mind if someone wants attention. I don't like people who play with thoughts to make them painful and stupid. I can say what I want about them and command respect. I need to talk about things. I feel better if I post them in a blog. It kind of gets a lot of views. That way, posting online, people might venture in here and react to it when they post to me. Some people might like the lyrical background I have in style.
I do have one thing down in life and that is to try to be appealing in a European way. I'm not quite sure exactly all the reasons other people have for liking European things.
Pretty much, I can accept things, but if something goes wrong I usually end up posting about it. Maybe, I need to learn to think, again. I have problems and can't think to myself about things like this. Without writing them down. I actually used to write a lot more complexly than this. I just didn't socialize on the internet. I did assignments and wrote e-mails. I write better, now, though and perhaps more easily understood.
In ways, I don't feel safe, but I know it's not my fault and so I will R.I.P. but will not kill myself. I think the police wanted me dead. They didn't come to the scene of the crime. I heard some gunshots. They didn't do much I think when I called about something online. I feel pretty safe as I am now. I just had goals like to be a movie star! I think everyone should consider acting or modeling. Girls should consider modeling, guys acting. Some girls don't want to model. Models can become movie stars!
So, I just find that it feels funny when you're followed, but it's okay, just something to take note of I guess. I don't really ask for attention. I don't like when I do get my expected attention that it gets taken away just because to be racist or mean or something. I guess I'll just have to accept what comes my way but not do these things myself? I find that people hate me for no reason and think they can take liberty over me when feelings like that, that I can do something and you can't, shouldn't exist. I don't know where things like this came from. That's just sick. People often swoon over my parents, I know, and leave me in the brush. It's actually the opposite, people feel warm about my parents yet find me more fun. I'm simply wondering about the message. I always am open for people to get attention but not to put me down in the process, like I'm still cool.
I don't need my grandma
influencing the decisions of my parents. They are always mean to me and deny they know anything about the "n" word thing it seems. I want to get it settled in the meat. I cared about my relationship. My dad talks to my grandma every week. I wanted a break from talking to her for now. Every day for 45 minutes took its toll on her. I know who's up to no good. No one has to listen to their elders when they are adults because they aren't even supposed to live near them. My parents like airheads will go along with anything these days to punish me for something I did in the far past that was an accident or misunderstanding, while in general I'm pretty good, considered like perfect, really. They keep digging into my thoughts, but my thoughts go haywire because of the attacks on me of people reading into my mind about the "n" word. I don't want any surprises left behind by my grandma to my dad in how they treat me and what we're thinking about. I don't need to be punished to call my grandma and her not give me a break from her like this. I think she influenced my dad to make it sound like he called me a nigger and would act like it wasn't her fault and she doesn't approve of the way he did it. She thinks without being on the computer herself she can conduct what goes on in my life on the computer like 24/7. She reacts to that, and it affected how her brother spoke to me. This is not about her. It's about my mom and dad right now and me being alone on the computer, like before the "n" word thing and what came to pass|follow.
I'm always right.
Why do I need my family? I knew them living in Orlando while I was in college spelled disaster.
I'm off to catch up on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show."
I have 2 episodes to finish. I only just started the 1st one.
I guess
you can do the right thing without submitting to others. Just don't do anything but the right thing. Realize what's important and that you don't have to go all crazy. Like, realize yes I agree that this is this. Say, you've been a alot, through a lot to yourself, and you don't get something is all and you know you don't get it, finally.
I'm the best person in the woorld!
You know what counts.
I would never believe it's right to be mean to anyone! Oh no!
I would never believe it's right to be mean to anyone! Oh no!
If someone does something to you
like, you can defend yourself. Still, I wouldn't do anything bad unless it were to save my life, which was not this situation to me.
People are still being mean to me.
They want to get me into the sensation that called someone the "n" word on purpose, like I didn't think they wanted it. I actually thought I got clear sign from multiple sources and the person themself to do so. I mean, I think we all know people do that and that it just happens and it's not so hard in a way.
I guess that finally addresses
the concern about someone's upbringing, hoping only I don't have an excuse.
Why give me one?
I wonder if some babies are born in perfect worlds. I mean, are they perfect or are they just fortunate|lucky?
But aren't they the ones suddenly claiming
you shouldn't be with your parents, anymore?
You know, a lot of people live with their grandmother and practically with their aunts.
You know, a lot of people live with their grandmother and practically with their aunts.
Wow, the situation isn't even
an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.
Some people are not so bad and do things for reasons!
Some people are not so bad and do things for reasons!
Some people are so lost.
People have made exceptions to the rules. The truth remains the truth. Things happen for reasons.
How could it not being as bad as it could be
be okay and since when are crazy things allowed only for some people?
Some people change the rules in the process.
As though there ever were any! Some things remain unspoken for a time.
Held at Brink and Mistakes
People are crazy about what would happen to them in certain situations.
Every heard of if you like to do it at all then keep doing it?
Every heard of if you like to do it at all then keep doing it?
I guess you just can't escape
getting things right.
It's funny how maybe there isn't always a reason for everything, though, like you've done something unforgivable, even if you're sorry and it was an accident, anyway.
It's funny how maybe there isn't always a reason for everything, though, like you've done something unforgivable, even if you're sorry and it was an accident, anyway.
Why do people think
that it can't be that I'm okay, that there was a reason for everything? That's the kind of person I am. It might not be all okay in ways. The point is though that I guess that logic for some reason exists.
Sometimes, the best people go through rough times.
Like, they get sick, but they're still better off than anyone else for making the sacrifices and decisions that they did.
It's funny what makes people come to care.
People who do wrong things on a daily basis are let to go like they're worthless.
It's funny how those "smart" people aren't good enough.
I guess they don't have to get punished because their lives were different.
People are so mean and don't know what they're doing.
They're not even in the same situation, and that was the problem to begin with.
Good people are prodded
into believing that evil should exist and that they should be evil as a sacrifice to their ego, which is unnecessary and unproven.
People's Mistakes
People do not see the situation literally and just want to pick at you as though they're your mom when they really don't care about you at all.
Some people can attest to that in more ways than one they cannot be trusted.
Some people can attest to that in more ways than one they cannot be trusted.
The picture of me
is from a little after the end of the school year before I moved away from Florida.
Photobucket
I changed the link:
Photobucket
Photobucket
I changed the link:
Photobucket
I'm going somewhere tomorrow around 12:30-1 P.M.
I am not sure if we're doing anything else, so I don't know when I'll be back. I could be back as early as around 3 P.M.
Elaborating and Trickery
Some people spend all their time on making things up that you did in intention in your talking.
Also, people think they can hide themselves bargaining on tricks.
Also, people think they can hide themselves bargaining on tricks.
What I Learned in New Orleans in College
etc.
I only have so much steam. Gotta use it to the best of my survival... :'(
I only have so much steam. Gotta use it to the best of my survival... :'(
I JUST laughed so hard at one poster
that I got stimulated from being stimulated. Whooh. Never had that happen. :|
I wonder if some people would like to be treated
how they treat me. They already believe in creating your own protocol.
I'm taking a break talking to my grandma.
About going back, I dunno if I wanna do Bible verses. It plays with my clear mind.
My dad might start kickboxing again.
I wonder why he waited so long. He told me on our walk after talking to his mom. We were supposed to go to the gym together, but he's getting a bike he likes better, probably, though before my parents said it was too expensive. It's funny the kickboxing is 3 times a week and he wanted to just go to the gym once a week, on Sundays. I'm glad he has these goals because he needs them.
Ghost
2012-05-28 - night - I saw a churning shadow by my dad's glasses.
Also, I put the ghosts in order from most recent.
Also, I put the ghosts in order from most recent.
Why does my grandma take liberty
over things and why did my dad listen to her and not admit it? It seeped out later.
And in his mind
he is dissing my new profile picture and acts like he didn't do anything wrong. He did just want my mom doesn't want him to like he's a toy I mean I'm a toy and he's trying to stimulate me. My mom did what she wasn't supposed to do when he left for work once and I ended up in the mental hospital for a day. He said today also I don't know where you're gonna sleep tonight if I don't take my medicine.
I don't know what my problem is.
I mean my dad's problem is. He was talking to my mom and seemed to sneer that I was the black kid on the TV, empty and not white.
Reply to a Deleted Topic
I went to college in New Orleans and lived in the area as a teenager. I know the city is very dirty. After a big hurricane there, though, it was a lot cleaner.
Only My Dad
He was the only one totally not for me calling the 1-year-old the "n" word on command to begin with. So, I should have a soft spot for him. :|
Retarded!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My dad acted like saying the word "retarded" was "retarded." It's something OTHER PEOPLE DO TOO YOU IDIOT
Something That Happened
1st, it sounded like my dad called me a nigger in the noise he was making, making up for it in some way. I got mad. He yelled at me. While we were watching the movie, he acted like he was stimulating someone I care about. This was after he talked to my grandma, from the "n" word thing when he called me in to do pills with him.
I had thought that they had
that it was okay to call someone something if they called you it 1st. They symbolically did just that to me.
"Just in Case"
You know, I don't like people who live like a mold with a big mold and say they can act as good as a Vietnamese with how precious something evil is.
Anyway, I don't like that.
Just in case I use it? I shouldn't be bashed, either way! I was convinced they wanted me to use it from being bashed about my race by posters who were supposedly Tim Burton!
Anyway, I don't like that.
Just in case I use it? I shouldn't be bashed, either way! I was convinced they wanted me to use it from being bashed about my race by posters who were supposedly Tim Burton!
The Facts That Matter to People
People need to grasp that I thought someone wanted me to call them the "n" word regardless of whether they did or not, it's provable and it's publicized!
No one can be trying to teach me something...
...I already know. That situation is within the situation.
Monday, May 28, 2012
My dad and I've been...
...watching Happy Feet 2 and I've been talking to him about people treating me funnily about the "n" word.
All Day
It sounded like I was cursing on the inside, but most people didn't mind though they probably influenced me to do it. It started out I e-mailed my aunt and told her about my grocery shopping. My mom came in. She was testy, in a way that made sense, and in the end I pushed her, like friendly but upset. She's like you never pushed me, and I don't remember but think I have. She's barged in on me in ways. So, my dad also acted differently. I came out and looked at them wondering about their last secret message. I stomped my feet today at them but not like crazily.
He had just talked to my grandma...
...I've been up since 5 and am kinda tired.
He changed all of a sudden. We were doing pills and it sounded like he called me a nigger. Then, he seemed to try to stimulate me by thinking of someone I care about in a way I didn't like.
He changed all of a sudden. We were doing pills and it sounded like he called me a nigger. Then, he seemed to try to stimulate me by thinking of someone I care about in a way I didn't like.
I've been...
...out talking with my dad about the "n" word thing. We couldn't finish. We finished up on Johnny Depp, my dad saying basically he doesn't care about anyone but himself in that before he said no one cares about anyone and then that Johnny Depp like for instance doesn't know about me and stuff like that. I had complained near the end that people can read into me even when I don't want them to and it's because they think something like they aren't capable of being a movie star but are so good they can read into me like it's not because I'm smart. My dad said Johnny Depp won't know me unless I am like in a movie with him.
Bye!
I'll be gone all day. I might go jogging this evening. Well, I might be back in the late afternoon or maybe at night. Like, I might be here by 10 P.M. Dunno.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Why does everyone else get away with fooling around?
Just because they've gotten themselves in a bind doesn't mean they can use me. This stuff doesn't have to happen to others!
It's nice to know that
things should be done in an orderly fashion and that rest preps you up for when you're able to make decisions in the world, one day.
I can't find this post, neither.
I said something about Johnny Depp having things Mickey Mouse probably because I was upset about the "n" word thing. I'll try not to get upset. It's funny when he does that. We all do that sometimes.
Why do I feel the urge to say sorry
long after I already have? I thought usually you did it one time, maybe others, though for most people that would be considered unnecessary. I didn't think there were any exceptions to the rule.
Is it something I missed? Why doesn't anyone else do anything like this?
Is it something I missed? Why doesn't anyone else do anything like this?
Certain Words Versus Certain Actions
There is no "bad word," just bad meanings. These days, it's become safe to not use them against others, though I accept when people are bad to me. I agree, it seems like it would be out-of-place to use certain ones, but at least the person knows they didn't do anything wrong if they are called something, though they may have done something wrong to be in that position, depends really.
I know people don't get in trouble for using lots of words a lot. I thought I'd use them only when they fit in and not against others, I guess unless the unlikely even that I lost it in which case would be a defense. It's become so that they pry on perfectionists so that when attacked you shouldn't be using bad words. It's probably not an idea that makes sense, anyway. Just consider these words fads.
I know people don't get in trouble for using lots of words a lot. I thought I'd use them only when they fit in and not against others, I guess unless the unlikely even that I lost it in which case would be a defense. It's become so that they pry on perfectionists so that when attacked you shouldn't be using bad words. It's probably not an idea that makes sense, anyway. Just consider these words fads.
I can't find a post.
I thought I said Johnny Depp was ditzy. People say he acts drunk. That's probably because they say he drinks a lot of alcohol. At least, I didn't say that. I was mad already about something that's had some people up on me. I didn't say what it was. I already addressed that issue, though. It was quite successful of an address. I can't even find the sensation I was thinking of. :( Anyway, sorry. I just find that his fans or the public take him haphazardly and keep getting confused. He seems to designate that his fans are innocent.
Johnny Depp
I was thinking about him while I posted some things but didn't say it was him specifically I intended to point out.
They seem to always find something.
Though, it doesn't make sense. I'm hoping my dad just gets a new remote.
Johnny Depp
He probably doesn't like being told this, but he did seem to put pressure on posting about him online after Sweeney Todd, or is it just me that I did music and thought I should? It's just that you can't prove the opposite point if that's not what happened. I forget how I figured.
I'M TIRED OF PEOPLE PICKING ON ME
"The Ellen DeGeneres Show" didn't play and record on Friday. Now, the remote's not working. It's just not working pressing the guide and record options. I threw it 2 years ago when I was mad, and suddenly this happens. That's when I went to the mental hospital for a month.
Why not just happily roll along?
Go along with the crowd and laugh at how bad I am and my situation!
Don't deny though when it seems like I as a person deserve something.
Don't deny though when it seems like I as a person deserve something.
Flawed Logic
You'd think, oh, well that's too bad if you wanted a better relationship with your parents because I don't have one.
Proof No One Cares About Me
So, I have problems when I go to the ice cream shop with customers and with the people who work at all the smoothie places.
Also, I think Helena Bonham Carter wants me dead in at 1st acting like I should call her daughter the "n" word online. I can see her thinking that I might kill her from being so mad at how she rubs in her joy that Tim Burton is her father and I don't get to see him. He's stopped doing interviews, too, so I've lost interest in him. Not really, but he seems nice when he does get out in public. Anyway, I can just see Helena Bonham Carter saying, "She's going to do it" about her daughter acting mean, and she did. She cares so much about her daughter she wants to get me mad enough to kill her, but I won't, of course. She thinks I need to get it out another way and plans to do me away because she wants Tim Burton all for herself and he likes me and she's Jewish and figures she can pick on me being Chinese-Indonesian though Tim Burton liked me a lot.
Also, I think Helena Bonham Carter wants me dead in at 1st acting like I should call her daughter the "n" word online. I can see her thinking that I might kill her from being so mad at how she rubs in her joy that Tim Burton is her father and I don't get to see him. He's stopped doing interviews, too, so I've lost interest in him. Not really, but he seems nice when he does get out in public. Anyway, I can just see Helena Bonham Carter saying, "She's going to do it" about her daughter acting mean, and she did. She cares so much about her daughter she wants to get me mad enough to kill her, but I won't, of course. She thinks I need to get it out another way and plans to do me away because she wants Tim Burton all for herself and he likes me and she's Jewish and figures she can pick on me being Chinese-Indonesian though Tim Burton liked me a lot.
I felt really depressed, but...
Highlight to read if you want to read about going to the bathroom
I didn't feel like I had to pooh, but I had to pee but not that badly. I ended up going just because I had to blow my nose and got my hands dirty. I do have hand sanitizer in my room. Anyway, so I went and I poohed kind of a lot. I feel better now.
I didn't feel like I had to pooh, but I had to pee but not that badly. I ended up going just because I had to blow my nose and got my hands dirty. I do have hand sanitizer in my room. Anyway, so I went and I poohed kind of a lot. I feel better now.
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Explaining and Pointing out Things
It's about explaining things and pointing things out without having to say anything further.
Oversimplifying and Overcomplicating
Howcome some people try to oversimplify things and overcomplicate them?
Even though you don't feed your kid right
supposedly, you expect their behavior to be in a queue on spot?
THOSE ... WERE ... THE ... DAYS
MY FRIEND
I THOUGHT THEY'D NEVER END
THOSE WERE THE DAYS
THE DAYS THE DAYS MY FRIEND
THOSE WERE THE DAYS, MY FRIEND
I THOUGHT THEY'D NEVER END
THOSE WERE THE DAYS
THE DAYS, THE DAYS, MY FRIEND
I THOUGHT THEY'D NEVER END
THOSE WERE THE DAYS
THE DAYS THE DAYS MY FRIEND
THOSE WERE THE DAYS, MY FRIEND
I THOUGHT THEY'D NEVER END
THOSE WERE THE DAYS
THE DAYS, THE DAYS, MY FRIEND
Skilled
Some people need to learn not to put a negative twang to their messages. I can do without a secret message for a good few years.
Tip: Exercise
I moved the Tips section on my MySpace to be higher up and added a tip on exercising:
"Just doing a little exercise in any area goes a long way. You have to do some exercise I think in each major area: jogging, sit-ups, side sit-ups, and push-ups."
myspace.com/christina-barrett
"Just doing a little exercise in any area goes a long way. You have to do some exercise I think in each major area: jogging, sit-ups, side sit-ups, and push-ups."
myspace.com/christina-barrett
I feeeel good .....
I went for a jog, took a shower and a bath, and did my sit-ups, side sit-ups, and push-ups.
I figure the price to pay for the "n" word misunderstanding
is that it's not going to be feasible now for me to be an actor.
So, I figured
that some people just hold onto stark reality of "what's" been done and not the big picture.
Why would people have to resort to picking on me to begin with?
I was pretty presentable. People don't want any part of what's initially their fault that things got started. I know it shouldn't matter that much.
People seem to wonder now
why go into something about someone if that person isn't even there if it's too much.
So, am I the bad guy now?
I think not. The one who doesn't know what she's doing? Why is that debatable?
Do you ever feel people are gauging your attitude?
People get mad and others are okay with it all the time.
I guess people don't want bad things to elicit a response.
I guess people don't want bad things to elicit a response.
On no's!
"The Ellen DeGeneres Show" didn't record. Instead, there's an hour's coverage of a fire in a road. I know that reruns don't record with talk shows and yea other TV shows. I know this wasn't a rerun, though. :'(
I feel like I'm gonna see a ghost of some sort if
I watch "The Ellen DeGeneres Show," but here I go. It's fun.
Apparently
My life of staying at home and of just doing message boards to read has been dissevered.
I got upset at racism, and then I ended up leaving the house some. I got mad and threw some things and got sent to the mental hospital for a month. Every time I go there it really changes me, but my dad is kicking me out if I ever go back. Last time, I was there for 1 day. So, since then, I've been leaving the house more.
My grandma wanted me to read some Bible readings with my dad and then had me call her every day for maybe almost a year and do Bible readings. It was a bit different. I don't even give myself up to reading any books nor think I am in good health to. At 1st, I thought her reading was a joke. I mean the passages are so short. I've stopped calling her, at least until September. I still like going to the movies, though, so we'll see what I do, altogether.
I got upset at racism, and then I ended up leaving the house some. I got mad and threw some things and got sent to the mental hospital for a month. Every time I go there it really changes me, but my dad is kicking me out if I ever go back. Last time, I was there for 1 day. So, since then, I've been leaving the house more.
My grandma wanted me to read some Bible readings with my dad and then had me call her every day for maybe almost a year and do Bible readings. It was a bit different. I don't even give myself up to reading any books nor think I am in good health to. At 1st, I thought her reading was a joke. I mean the passages are so short. I've stopped calling her, at least until September. I still like going to the movies, though, so we'll see what I do, altogether.
Passing Thought
Did you notice people used to be about being bad, like it means you're not stuck up, and now they act like they've vied for traditional goodness, in a way?
How can you judge a situation you're not in?
Some things matter to some people already, so it's not like something new. It's like something set in stone.
People think they can dish out sex appeal to me.
In the form of condemning me, but that's beyond the point. I'm kind of an adult. I agree, people who are born in the late 60s and onward are still kids, though.
Baiting
Some things do make sense to me. However, some things have bothered me.
Still, I'm not quite right, with some things. I can take them as they are, but I've already started complaining. There's no sense in going back. I am worried, though.
Still, I'm not quite right, with some things. I can take them as they are, but I've already started complaining. There's no sense in going back. I am worried, though.
Fools
I'm not justified into being prodded for the "n" word thing. Sometimes, when you're mad, you use the word. If someone did something to you, you might use it. It was only online and like no one saw because I deleted it. I was totally being wronged and still am. I wish I didn't use it and wouldn't have if I could go back. I just wasn't feeling well, and it's not my fault.
This has turned into
people thinking hopefully I deserve to be forwardly prodded into worshiping them and wronging myself.
Making Your Own Decisions
Some people are obsessed with trying to pick at you for things you shouldn't have done but that aren't that bad.
A lot of people won't admit that some things are really misunderstandings because they themselves are more disqualified to pass|contribute judgement.
A lot of people won't admit that some things are really misunderstandings because they themselves are more disqualified to pass|contribute judgement.
Friday, May 25, 2012
Did you ever notice
when some people do something very different only in certain situations, probably connected to racism?
I mean, I guess some things are serious, but sometimes you can see through what's actually happening, too.
Some things are pretty concrete, also in why they happened.
I mean, I guess some things are serious, but sometimes you can see through what's actually happening, too.
Some things are pretty concrete, also in why they happened.
@TheEllenShow - Helene Campbell and Olivia Munn
Don't feel obliged to click on the links! Nor read any of this!
The 1st girl is from near where my relatives are from, and she reminded me of me. I feel kind of comfortable seeing her but not totally. She's kinda similar to my relatives but not really. I might have Canadian blood according to something I thought matched that I looked up, but I'm not sure. If I had my old family tree, I'd know. I just don't know if I should ask. My dad went up north with my brother when I was staying behind to audition to start taking dance at a community college, but I didn't. They found out more about our ethnicity but didn't bring back anything on our family tree. I have a shorter version of our family tree from our brother, and I think my more recent ones were different, as well. I don't know why I didn't keep track of that stuff.
Olivia Munn is half Chinese from her mom, like me. My mom's ancestors are from Indonesia, I think, maybe for 50 years. I see she was mostly raised in Japan, Tokyo. I know a girl on Facebook whose mom is French and whose dad is Japanese. When I told her I liked Jewish, she said she was also Jewish. She also had a long nose and was unbelievably skinny but not gaunt. I'm guessing she was raised in Paris or France, I think, and then moved to Tokyo as an adult. My nose looks long from my right side, but generally it doesn't look that thin, which doesn't really feel good. I felt a bit uncomfortable about Olivia Munn. I used to post at Eurasian Nation. Eurasian people are really sensitive. If you are cool and different, they attack you or act superior for some fetched reason, like being part Native American like me. My dad's mom's dad has Native American. It's from the Northeast, though. It is nice, in a way. I'd prefer to have it than to not, but it can be frustrating. I don't like being beat for it. It's probably better not to have it; I mean, a lot of people don't. It's probably easier than being part anything else or at least African. Here's a picture of a Native American with Dutch heritage|name: picture. Oh, f.y.i., if you're reading this and don't know Olivia Munn's, mom was raised in Vietnam! She's from Oklahoma. Oh, about my nose. it gets bigger at the bottom. I don't know if it's always looked big at the bottom from the front. I've gained some weight in my life. It's interesting to finally see a couple people who are pretty successful at looking European who are half Asian. It's interesting seeing how this person cloaked it. Sometimes, you got Asian vibes, especially when she was dancing. I wonder why. I met a person who had such big features who was part Chinese and Filipino I think, maybe half and half, not sure, but I would imagine she said Chinese 1st. She was singing that song that this person came out to and danced to. It sounded like she could win an academy award if things went right. Anyway, she was from California, I think L.A. but am not sure. I think that's why she was so thick, big head, big eyes, big hands, big arms. She looked maybe Middle Eastern, in a way. This was when I was at the mental hospital. I couldn't stand it this time. I was only there a day, and my dad is gonna kick me out if I go back. I saw the doctor after talking to her, and he thought I looked good, though I did get out on my own means, as well. You seemed to like her humbleness in being Asian, something that's different with me, so that made me uncomfortable. It's funny how people hone in on Asians, but they are very different. I think Africans are the next step up. The Middle East in ways is like Europe. So, I do realize Asian is not that good, but I don't think she does. She seems to humble herself as a person to you, but I don't exactly belittle myself like I like Asian. I don't feel an obligation to foil others by being Asian.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/foil
"a person or thing that makes another seem better by contrast"
I've realized, after awhile, that it's wrong to be racist and wrong to not realize when you've gone out of your way to be racist or used people literally to foil yourself in racist ways. Who doesn't? Even people who are condoned are. It's funny if Asians are so attractive that they are put at the bottom of the list when mixed with European. I guess it's a sure sign you'll win if you're mom's Chinese and your dad's European. A lot of mixes seem to be a non-European dad and a European mom, too. I did see a small picture from maybe the side or back of a girl who was half Irish and half Chinese. I think she looked Chinese, as most do. A lot of them seem to have complex mixes but probably not most of them. Like, there might be someone with like 1|8 European maybe, I dunno. I was surprised, though, when I saw someone with a daughter who was 1|4 European. I'm not sure if the mom was Middle Eastern or Far Eastern or what. I imagine this is a boring topic. Well, it was so cool to see Olivia Munn on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show!"
Don't feel obliged to click on the links! Nor read any of this!
About Helene Campbell, I guess you can see the differences between people from the northeast and from the south. Taylor Swift is originally from Pennsylvania but moved to Tennessee for high school. I found a YouTube of her singing as a kid! YouTube. Here's one of her where you see her as a kid singing the national anthem: YouTube. I guess there are a few YouTubes of her as a child. None of them really remind me a whole lot up front of my relatives. I guess she is more like them than me, in a way. The people in general there seem pretty nice. It seems the young people in ways are very different from their parents. My dad's lived in a place called the same word that this makes up and it's from Buffalo which is a bit north: Website. These people are from there, where my dad's lived: Pictures. I particularly find I like this one: Picture. Here's near where my grandma lives now: 1 2 3 (scroll with the white bar.) I'm not sure exactly the area where most of my relatives live, but it seems like more of them might live in New York. I've also lived in the New Orleans area and went to college there for 1-2 years. Here's a picture of a girl from there: Picture. I've also lived in northeastern Florida: 1 2 3. I'm originally from southeastern Florida, above Miami: where Johnny Depp lived mostly 1 2 3, where I started 1, I think the 1st place I lived 1 2, where I was born 1 girl from there who was in northeastern Florida for college for 4 years and in the Dominican Republic for 1 year 2 3, where I live now Orlando 1. Wow, I put a lot of links in this. No need to click on them.
I'm not sure about ultimately comparing different places people are from. There are lots of famous people from NYC and England. NYC 1 2 3, London 1 2 veiled nudity 3 western England.
My dad went to college in the 2nd largest city in Washington state for I think a school year. My aunt went in California for I'm not sure how long. They grew up in northwestern Pennsylvania and southwestern New York ... New York ... state.
I guess I've gone a bit far. I'll go ahead and post this. Byye!
Oh, I looked up people from Washington: 1. And L.A. 1.
The 1st girl is from near where my relatives are from, and she reminded me of me. I feel kind of comfortable seeing her but not totally. She's kinda similar to my relatives but not really. I might have Canadian blood according to something I thought matched that I looked up, but I'm not sure. If I had my old family tree, I'd know. I just don't know if I should ask. My dad went up north with my brother when I was staying behind to audition to start taking dance at a community college, but I didn't. They found out more about our ethnicity but didn't bring back anything on our family tree. I have a shorter version of our family tree from our brother, and I think my more recent ones were different, as well. I don't know why I didn't keep track of that stuff.
Olivia Munn is half Chinese from her mom, like me. My mom's ancestors are from Indonesia, I think, maybe for 50 years. I see she was mostly raised in Japan, Tokyo. I know a girl on Facebook whose mom is French and whose dad is Japanese. When I told her I liked Jewish, she said she was also Jewish. She also had a long nose and was unbelievably skinny but not gaunt. I'm guessing she was raised in Paris or France, I think, and then moved to Tokyo as an adult. My nose looks long from my right side, but generally it doesn't look that thin, which doesn't really feel good. I felt a bit uncomfortable about Olivia Munn. I used to post at Eurasian Nation. Eurasian people are really sensitive. If you are cool and different, they attack you or act superior for some fetched reason, like being part Native American like me. My dad's mom's dad has Native American. It's from the Northeast, though. It is nice, in a way. I'd prefer to have it than to not, but it can be frustrating. I don't like being beat for it. It's probably better not to have it; I mean, a lot of people don't. It's probably easier than being part anything else or at least African. Here's a picture of a Native American with Dutch heritage|name: picture. Oh, f.y.i., if you're reading this and don't know Olivia Munn's, mom was raised in Vietnam! She's from Oklahoma. Oh, about my nose. it gets bigger at the bottom. I don't know if it's always looked big at the bottom from the front. I've gained some weight in my life. It's interesting to finally see a couple people who are pretty successful at looking European who are half Asian. It's interesting seeing how this person cloaked it. Sometimes, you got Asian vibes, especially when she was dancing. I wonder why. I met a person who had such big features who was part Chinese and Filipino I think, maybe half and half, not sure, but I would imagine she said Chinese 1st. She was singing that song that this person came out to and danced to. It sounded like she could win an academy award if things went right. Anyway, she was from California, I think L.A. but am not sure. I think that's why she was so thick, big head, big eyes, big hands, big arms. She looked maybe Middle Eastern, in a way. This was when I was at the mental hospital. I couldn't stand it this time. I was only there a day, and my dad is gonna kick me out if I go back. I saw the doctor after talking to her, and he thought I looked good, though I did get out on my own means, as well. You seemed to like her humbleness in being Asian, something that's different with me, so that made me uncomfortable. It's funny how people hone in on Asians, but they are very different. I think Africans are the next step up. The Middle East in ways is like Europe. So, I do realize Asian is not that good, but I don't think she does. She seems to humble herself as a person to you, but I don't exactly belittle myself like I like Asian. I don't feel an obligation to foil others by being Asian.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/foil
"a person or thing that makes another seem better by contrast"
I've realized, after awhile, that it's wrong to be racist and wrong to not realize when you've gone out of your way to be racist or used people literally to foil yourself in racist ways. Who doesn't? Even people who are condoned are. It's funny if Asians are so attractive that they are put at the bottom of the list when mixed with European. I guess it's a sure sign you'll win if you're mom's Chinese and your dad's European. A lot of mixes seem to be a non-European dad and a European mom, too. I did see a small picture from maybe the side or back of a girl who was half Irish and half Chinese. I think she looked Chinese, as most do. A lot of them seem to have complex mixes but probably not most of them. Like, there might be someone with like 1|8 European maybe, I dunno. I was surprised, though, when I saw someone with a daughter who was 1|4 European. I'm not sure if the mom was Middle Eastern or Far Eastern or what. I imagine this is a boring topic. Well, it was so cool to see Olivia Munn on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show!"
Don't feel obliged to click on the links! Nor read any of this!
About Helene Campbell, I guess you can see the differences between people from the northeast and from the south. Taylor Swift is originally from Pennsylvania but moved to Tennessee for high school. I found a YouTube of her singing as a kid! YouTube. Here's one of her where you see her as a kid singing the national anthem: YouTube. I guess there are a few YouTubes of her as a child. None of them really remind me a whole lot up front of my relatives. I guess she is more like them than me, in a way. The people in general there seem pretty nice. It seems the young people in ways are very different from their parents. My dad's lived in a place called the same word that this makes up and it's from Buffalo which is a bit north: Website. These people are from there, where my dad's lived: Pictures. I particularly find I like this one: Picture. Here's near where my grandma lives now: 1 2 3 (scroll with the white bar.) I'm not sure exactly the area where most of my relatives live, but it seems like more of them might live in New York. I've also lived in the New Orleans area and went to college there for 1-2 years. Here's a picture of a girl from there: Picture. I've also lived in northeastern Florida: 1 2 3. I'm originally from southeastern Florida, above Miami: where Johnny Depp lived mostly 1 2 3, where I started 1, I think the 1st place I lived 1 2, where I was born 1 girl from there who was in northeastern Florida for college for 4 years and in the Dominican Republic for 1 year 2 3, where I live now Orlando 1. Wow, I put a lot of links in this. No need to click on them.
I'm not sure about ultimately comparing different places people are from. There are lots of famous people from NYC and England. NYC 1 2 3, London 1 2 veiled nudity 3 western England.
My dad went to college in the 2nd largest city in Washington state for I think a school year. My aunt went in California for I'm not sure how long. They grew up in northwestern Pennsylvania and southwestern New York ... New York ... state.
I guess I've gone a bit far. I'll go ahead and post this. Byye!
Oh, I looked up people from Washington: 1. And L.A. 1.
So, what, exactly, do you go by?
Something happens, but there's logic that applies in everyday life.
Shouldn't the world all be nice?
Shouldn't the world all be nice?
Not Perfect but More Perfect
Just because other families trash their kids doesn't mean it's time to start picking at imperfection in your own!
Foiling
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/foil
"a person or thing that makes another seem better by contrast"
You know, I don't like it when people do something just to make someone else look good if it hurts you.
"a person or thing that makes another seem better by contrast"
You know, I don't like it when people do something just to make someone else look good if it hurts you.
How can you expect me not to get mad when I'm hurt?
It's just a reaction. Sure, bad things can come of that reaction. I should learn not to be affected. I think I'm getting more used to things.
Where I've Lived
Well, I know it's probably pretty nice in places I've never lived.
I'm pretty well-liked other than things I've done wrong.
It must be fun for me to go up north in the U.S. because my relatives are from Northwestern Pennsylvania.
I'm pretty well-liked other than things I've done wrong.
It must be fun for me to go up north in the U.S. because my relatives are from Northwestern Pennsylvania.
Someone tried to break in, yesterday.
I'm not supposed to go outside to wave, anymore, but I like doing that, especially since my dad waves back. I might be able to, as long as I remember to alarm the house. My room is the garage, and there is no way to lock it from the inside, too.
damkylan
Oh no! I have the wrong address for this poster! This poster hangs out with other posters I know, though.
I updated this post.
I said not to feel pressured to listen to it.
http://19christinabarrett86.blogspot.com/2012/05/more.html
http://19christinabarrett86.blogspot.com/2012/05/more.html
My Grandma
I wonder if she misses me calling her. At least, she gets a break. Maybe, sometimes we can call a lot, and sometimes we can take a break. I just really wanted a break right now, though. I miss when I used to not leave the house and not see anyone and just post online. I would make my own hamburgers and pizza with spices.
More
Don't feel pressured to listen to it.
1996 http://youtu.be/7YTYZnrkXkM
2003
http://youtu.be/YFJouAtBKRw
http://youtu.be/Ap0ygdAWtq0
2004 http://youtu.be/TqpEcY3Pz1E
1996 http://youtu.be/7YTYZnrkXkM
2003
http://youtu.be/YFJouAtBKRw
http://youtu.be/Ap0ygdAWtq0
2004 http://youtu.be/TqpEcY3Pz1E
2007
It seems just recently that this genre has died out completely. I mean, I guess it hasn't, but I bet there's a certain signature to around 2005.
August 14, 2006
http://www.amazon.com/Peaceful-Featuring-Steve-Gorn/dp/B000TELC8Q/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=dmusic&qid=1337936407&sr=1-1
Everything from around 2004-2006 sounds the same. Maybe, it all stopped 2007-2008, if not by 2006.
Remember this from December 2005?
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0013PB22Q/ref=dm_dp_trk10?ie=UTF8&qid=1337827758&sr=8-4
I also noticed that mid-length sleeves exist, which didn't in 1997-1998, nor much 1999-2000 and not so much more. I don't know when they got popular.
Everything from around 2004-2006 sounds the same. Maybe, it all stopped 2007-2008, if not by 2006.
Remember this from December 2005?
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0013PB22Q/ref=dm_dp_trk10?ie=UTF8&qid=1337827758&sr=8-4
I also noticed that mid-length sleeves exist, which didn't in 1997-1998, nor much 1999-2000 and not so much more. I don't know when they got popular.
@TheEllenShow - The Lady Who Lost Her Legs
Mrs. Ellen DeGeneres!
I'm so in awe that you had the lady who lost her legs on your show. I feel so sorry for her. I should start talking about things like this, more. I certainly had thought of them within the past year.
They should give people realistic looking legs! They should be fully functional. What if they want to be a movie star?
I don't really feel my legs nor much of anything, anymore. Something interesting to you might be that it's because of going up north for the 1st and only time for very long, longer than a few weeks.
Still, I wish they had like ... http://www.disboards.com/forumdisplay.php?f=20
They should or I'm glad they have community groups like this, probably more in more urban types of areas, but I don't know! I wish they had upstanding places like this where other people could visit and cheer up people with their lives in disability.
It's so nice that you showcase these kinds of people for us on your show! I know Olivia Newton-John is making a wellness center. I wonder if the government could sprinkle things like this throughout our country more. I bet it's pretty expensive! I wonder if there's a way we can look, too, and prevent these things from happening. I guess we know in places that have frequent dangerous weather that doing the right thing is important. People need to be careful in general, like when crossing the road, which most people seem to be. Drunk driving is a big thing.
Well, thank you for doing this, Mrs. DeGeneres!
I'm so in awe that you had the lady who lost her legs on your show. I feel so sorry for her. I should start talking about things like this, more. I certainly had thought of them within the past year.
They should give people realistic looking legs! They should be fully functional. What if they want to be a movie star?
I don't really feel my legs nor much of anything, anymore. Something interesting to you might be that it's because of going up north for the 1st and only time for very long, longer than a few weeks.
Still, I wish they had like ... http://www.disboards.com/forumdisplay.php?f=20
They should or I'm glad they have community groups like this, probably more in more urban types of areas, but I don't know! I wish they had upstanding places like this where other people could visit and cheer up people with their lives in disability.
It's so nice that you showcase these kinds of people for us on your show! I know Olivia Newton-John is making a wellness center. I wonder if the government could sprinkle things like this throughout our country more. I bet it's pretty expensive! I wonder if there's a way we can look, too, and prevent these things from happening. I guess we know in places that have frequent dangerous weather that doing the right thing is important. People need to be careful in general, like when crossing the road, which most people seem to be. Drunk driving is a big thing.
Well, thank you for doing this, Mrs. DeGeneres!
I don't know why...
...but I feel better now that it's over, but I've also immuned myself to certain feelings. :)
It's that pill!
The pills did work, for awhile. I'm chopping them in half and eating them about every other day!
Thursday, May 24, 2012
I don't get too tired, anymore.
I'd been sleeping so my birthday would be good, and now I don't really get that tired.
Ear Plugs
I should get some ear plugs. I have some special waterproof ones for the bathtub. I saw them at the store.
A Little Bit of Housework Done
I've done some dishes and did my ironing for now. I have some more left because for some reason some clothes were still wet. My mom folded them, but I had to match things up. I have matching pajama sets. I need some better ones. It's hard to find good ones. I have one I really like a lot, the one that's white with pink and orange stripes. It's like light hot bright pink and orange. It looks like it's glowing. There were other colors, but it wasn't in my size. Now, I'm making some pancakes. For some reason, I guess maybe I poured too much in or something because I'm only getting 2 out of this batter.
I sent my aunt the e-mail
saying to tell my grandma I need some time not talking on the phone. Well, I did that, before, not talked on the phone for years, and it was a good time for me.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
People don't believe in hairy situations.
They don't think people can make mistakes because of having too many things to handle.
I get so mad.
Instead of thinking automatically, "I'm gonna kill * ." Something went through my head I guess, "I'm gonna kill someone." I'm not gonna, but I mean that thought came to me. I don't think it was a ghost, but I also got a lot of that after-vibe. 8|
Before, the word "shoot" was weaving in and out of jumbled words.
Before, the word "shoot" was weaving in and out of jumbled words.
I figured out my problem!
People think it's funny and cute to creep up on the best person in the class or a goody 2 shoes and make them think people like to curse for fun and then have other people find out and rat on them for not being all white.
My grandma called.
She still doesn't seem to understand why I post online. She said she doesn't know why I just sit at the computer.
I mean she called and my dad answered.
I mean she called and my dad answered.
I was thinking of going out and eating.
My brother is in his room, but my dad is out. Why not wait another hour? My brother might come out in 2. If not, so what? Also, my legs are cold though I'm wearing thin pants, but my upper body isn't.
It all started...
...when my grandma got upset at me. I decided to come out into the living area because my dad came to my door. I've been avoiding that while my brother is here for 3 months so he gets time with my parents and without me around.
Good Film Actresses
I saw this white blonde who had a pretty good shape working at Disney. She seemed pretty delusional. She had like puffy webbed out fingertips. I thought they were cute but one-dimensional. I wish she would get famous. She seems so smart. It was hard to believe she stood there all day getting drinks or something. I did see her walking.
Dressing Up My Desires
Why do some people think I have funny desires when they're more disdains of fetishes?
Did you ever think about...
...people stimulating you in a funny way if you're not perfect, just because you're already a perfectionist?
I think the blonde I posted...
...was a really big fan of Ellen DeGeneres. I wonder how many big fans she has and why they don't post online. They probably have but don't now.
So...
...I missed going to the store again with my dad. I'm actually pretty skinny today, too. It must be from the side sit-ups. Maybe, it is okay to eat my family's meal. Maybe, I can alternate. They never have mashed potatos.
Breakfast
For breakfast this morning, I had pancakes and eggs. I probably usually will have grain|oat cereal. That's what I had yesterday and probably the day or so before.
I owe the library $50.
My library card expired, too, but I don't know if that's partly why. I don't think so, now.
The internet just went down.
Anyway, with the "n" word thing, since I ended up having a misunderstanding as to what was right shouldn't I get a priority or something? I'm just saying. I know, as I get better, though, that things will heal.
It is nice to get a chance to nest in my room.
My mom said we're going somewhere next week. It's just to change that they said I was a male instead of a female.
Upper Body Workout
I'm gonna get it online when ASAP my dad and I go to put money on my credit card.
"Free Thinking"
So, sometimes, there comes a time when it feels I need to say something. I regret it, usually, but I don't process it right away.
I'm concerned.
My mom has always, in a way, supported my interest in other people. It's funny, my grandma wanted me to call her every night and read a Bible reading for the past year or so. I was sorta settling in with my parents still, but now I'm getting older, fast it seems. I thought I could do both, but for some reason it feels my immediate family is torn apart. I also e-mail my aunt, and our relationship is pretty good, a little hard when my life was hard though we still kept in touch.
He never looked like me.
He didn't have that sorta hard look. Well, he did look a lot like me when I didn't like how I looked, but I like him. I try to help him out. He's pretty cunning. He's not always very expressive, anymore. It's been like that since we moved to the New Orleans suburb. :|
He was different.
He was born with pink skin, but after awhile it got white. It got light pink again when he was 2. He had like light-ish or mousy brown hair, then. I guess if I had it, it would have been neat.
My Brother
He's obviously not the same as me, and it makes people wonder. I wonder if it's because of both of my parents.
Ooh.
And even if you did use the "n" word so what? Sometimes, it keeps people from killing each other is all I've found. Sure, it's not a good idea to use it?
You know, I was set up to have a good life.
I didn't do anything wrong. Someone wanted me to call them the "n" word. Leave me alone.
I wonder why my mom throws people's lives away.
I don't like her Oriental-influenced meals, and I think my dad and brother are jealous of my private eating.
I don't know why my brother is like he is.
I mainly am wondering why she isn't following through with her goals. It's like she doesn't want me to enjoy her. Wow, the world has sure ruined my family.
I don't know why my brother is like he is.
I mainly am wondering why she isn't following through with her goals. It's like she doesn't want me to enjoy her. Wow, the world has sure ruined my family.
Funny
My brother is in the shower now. I thought he was sleeping.
My mom said she'd see me sometime but didn't. Maybe she meant another time.
My mom said she'd see me sometime but didn't. Maybe she meant another time.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
I guess I've done enough jogging for awhile.
I'd like to more, but the upper body workouts and healthy food seem to be more of a concentration|concern.
Eating
I guess I'm steering clear of my family when they're together now for some reason. I'm gonna ask my aunt to tell my grandma I haven't been feeling well but would like to call ASAP.
Why do people keep boring
that you follow the obvious with someone when they don't want you to do that? I guess you can't fix your problem, like that.
It's how much you try.
Some people are treated worsely than others and led to believe things that others change the meaning of along the way.
Ooh.
I see people keep changing their minds. At least, I know what's going on and how they seem like they're dishonest people.
Because my dad is older than my mom...
...wait, people older than him don't have power over me. This is sick. He seems to find pleasure in manipulating me. I wonder if my mom led me to believe that. He has episodes of not being himself. He doesn't have to be silly you know, finding pleasure in my problems.
ARGH
LEAVE ME ALONE YOU PERVS
Now, I feel I can't sit up straight. I keep twitching and swaying just because I thought about it. I'm like going back and forth like a clock. It's like having a seizure.
Now, I feel I can't sit up straight. I keep twitching and swaying just because I thought about it. I'm like going back and forth like a clock. It's like having a seizure.
Female Thing
I just got a load after dreaming of having a baby girl who was red and pretty solid, like not wrinkly, and I guess kinda big. That's not what I want my child like. I had to get it, though... I'm guessing this won't be regular, as usual.
Young People Today
It's funny how complex people get as they age, but I was pretty complex when I was younger, too.
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